Gibberish from a gibberer

Revival is in the house...

2010-01-19T20:56:00.001+05:30

I hate the default font here... What happened to Tahoma? Sans Serif? and all the other nice fonts?

Trebuchet is the best one of the lot. Time for a blog update.I know the blog is dead. Long dead and gone. But every once in a while, it does seem worthwhile to breathe some life into it. Even if there is nothing to say.

It must have been love, but is it over now??

2009-05-31T15:55:00.003+05:30

When I read SwB's post about sports, my mind raced back to when I was young. Maybe like 7 or 8 years. When sports was nothing but pure passion.

When the walls had posters (courtesy Sportstar) of Roberto Baggio, Valderrama, Careca, Canniggia and Enzo Scifo! When I did not talk to mom and skipped breakfast after she did not wake me up to watch Argentina play Romania in the 1990 World Cup! When Argentina's losing to Germany in the 1990 WC Finals and seeing Maradona's tears made me want to thrash Mathhaeus and Voeller.

There was a time when waking up at 4 am to watch Srikkanth and Shastri take on McDermott and Reid and Marshall and Patterson in Australia was routine. When the only one who used to watch cricket in my 3rd standard class was a guy called Chetan.

There was a time when each time Sabatini lost to Graf, the hurt was so much that tears would fill up and flow much to my embarassment! When watching the semis and finals of the French Open and Wimbledon was always accompanied by the sound of pouring rain and when any sport that was shown live on Doordarshan was devoured compulsorily.

When the highlight of Saturday was World of Sports at 3.30 in the afternoon and when sports like billiards and golf and equestrian were watched with zeal just because they were sports and were on TV. And when watching the Rovers Cup finals live on Doordarshan meant less marks in the midterm Dictation exam the next day. There was a time when the sole ambition in life was to play doubles with Leander Paes in the Davis Cup.

That same magic is not there anymore. Maybe Cristiano Ronaldo can never be Diego Maradona. And the joy of watching Kapil Dev and Manoj Prabakhar bowl to Kepler Wessels and Andrew Hudson is not the same as watching Manish Pandey's heroics in the IPL. But maybe its gone. That love for the game that came above everything else. Maybe I am a spoiled fan now. Because now, at the click of a button, I can check the cricket scores and the football scores and the tennis scores in less than a minute. Keeping track of sports across channels robs the charm and the thrill of watching a sport as though your future depended on the result. Watching sports on DD meant undivided attention. Nothing else came in the way, No meal times or phone calls or fights for the remote or the guilty feeling of not having prepared for the exams. It was a simple uncomplicated world where nothing else came before sports on TV.

Times have changed. Now I see kids in Man U jerseys rattle off the names in the EPL at the drop of a hat. They know who Paul Conchesky is and which club he is playing for and what position. And I make a mental note of googling Paul Conchesky because I am too embarassed to say I have no idea who the guy is. When I was their age, no one in my class was as crazy as I was. No one cared about Maradona and no one knew who Sabatini was. In the 6th standard, I was asked to frame a set of questions for the class on sports. It was raining, so PE class meant doing something indoors like a sports quiz where all the 5 rows were seperate teams was and I asked what I thought would be easy questions. Much to my amazement, not many knew what was going on. The tables have turned now. When friends discuss sports, I am forced to pretend that I know who the men's singles number 1 is, which team Ryan Harris plays for, and who is the captain of the men's hockey team. When everyone discusses Formula One, I have to keep quiet because I dont know the F of Formula One.

The lesson is, I guess, this - When you love something with all you have, never lose touch with it. Else, its a hard long road to get back to where you once were. The same passion, the same magic and the same nothing else matters attitude. Its gone and I dont know whether I will get it back.

P. S. -> I miss blogging. I miss the world of the blogs. I have missed out on all the blogs I once used to religiously read everyday. I am getting a hang of what all I have missed out as I read the posts on Swb's blog. Its a lesson for me to never lose track of the blog world. Because sometimes when you can relate and identify with bloggers and have no contact with them except through their blogs, its a pain once you stop checking your Google Reader feeds and you realise you have lost touch with those people. So now on, no more ignoring Google Reader. My favourite blogs which I have missed the most - Swb, Mizohican, Katchucrap, India Uncut and many many more. I have missed you. Also, I will post here more often. With all my willpower and might. I will try to.

Some random and (very) stray observations

2009-04-07T17:24:00.002+05:30

So many reality shows on TV. MTV Splitsvilla is great if you love to check out fights on the street between two random people. MTV Roadies is great if you are an adult but your brain is still 8 years old. If you are into dance and you get kicks by watching people dance in outrageous costumes, then I suggest you don’t sleep for more than 3 hours a day because there are reality dance shows all the time. There is something called In Your Fest. Do check it out. It is extreme crap. Next thing, cookery shows on music channels. Presenting VJ Juhi’s culinary delights on Channel V’s Red Hot Chilli Peppers every Saturday at 11.30 a.m. By the time it boils, you check out this cool track – The latest bollywood movie song played for the ten thousandth time. Launchpad is the only saving grace right now, but I dread the day when Launchpad will have to hunt for bands. Good bands take years to develop, and a launchpad every year will mean bad bands and crap music that will be polished and decorated for television.

Elections, the biggest reality show, are hitting the house this month. Channel V is running a campaign called “Vote ya Vaat”. The idea is simple, you vote or else you will be in a very bad shape because this very cruel, evil government will be elected and you will be persecuted and left deformed and malfunctioning beyond any hope of repair. There was a time when the campaigns would go “VOTE FOR ME” and now they take the easy way out and just about everyone says “GO VOTE”. Politicians come on Channel V – self proclaimed youth icons – and ask you to vote. I suspect they cut the part where they say “For Me” and just show the first part where they say “Vote”. Times of India – that great epitome of freedom, justice and equality – have gotten into the act with some Lead India type campaign. I have made up my mind. I will vote. Hence, we will get a clean, honest and efficient government this time. Obviously. Don’t vote for change, and don’t vote for an upset, just go and vote.

My favourite sporting nation has always been Argentina, thanks to Maradona and Sabatini. Now, Argentina lost to Bolivia 1-6 on April fool’s Day. It was soccer (not tennis) but then besides the inauspicious day (any astrologer would agree), I feel it was the altitude that got to the Argentineans. Playing in La Paz is no joke, and although Bolivia is ranked 50 places below Argentina in the FIFA rankings, they are the number one team when you play in La Paz. Teach the Bolivians to hold a bat, and they will give the Indian team a run for their money in cricket atop La Paz.

Maneka Gandhi has been in the news lately, thanks to Varun Gandhi and Mayawati. I used to get moved by the tales of cruelty towards animals narrated by Maneka Gandhi on TV in the series called “Heads and Tails”. It was touching, but it did not change my life (or my non-veg diet) and I did not fall in love with animals. At home, we never had pets when I was small. Maybe that’s why I was and I still am, indifferent to the two pets we have right now – a dog and a cat. My sis is into pets big time and hence the pets exist. The cat is no problem. We have had a pet cat for quite some time now. When one cat would die, my sister would get another. Almost like recycling. Cats don’t bark. Dogs do. And the one pet dog we have, does bark loud and for no reason. That is one reason I am not very appreciative of the pet dog. For some reason, he starts howling and screaming in the middle of nothing. It’s not like he has seen a stranger or something unfamiliar. Maybe it’s his innate desire to get some attention in this world where everyone is so focussed on avoiding pink slips amidst the economic meltdown. But I don’t get it. Why does the dog make dumb, loud, crazy noises when everything else around is still? One more reason the cat scores is the fact that she does not come near you sniffing your feet in anticipation of an egg coming out of your toes any moment. The dog does. Now I love my pet dog as long as he stays away from me. I have this ‘you live and let me live’ policy. It can be also interpreted as a ‘you leave me alone and I leave you alone’ policy. The dog does not get it.

And yeah, the good old lady Madonna has been stopped from adopting another baby from Malawi. I don’t think she is doing the right thing by adopting a second baby from the same country. Just for kicks, she should be asked to adopt from some other country. There is Djibouti, Chad, Niger, Cameroon, Lesotho and many countries to choose from. Madonna is a funny one. If you are a young woman, Madonna will smooch you. If you are older, she probably wants you as a nanny. If you are a child, Madonna will adopt you. And if you are a guy, she might marry you. Okay, if you are a young guy, she might be looking at just a brief fling. But still wherever you go, Madonna may get you. She always is in the papers or somewhere near you. Omnipresent, I say.

Remember Jack and the beanstalk? If you ever make a movie on the story, remember to cast Dev Patel as the beanstalk. By the way, the beanstalk is dating the 4th sexiest woman in the world. Wow! Imagine the fate of Frieda Pinto’s classmates at St. Xavier’s. I’m sure some of them were thinking of Megan Fox and Angelina Jolie when the 4th sexiest woman in the world was sitting next to them in class. The most important lesson from it all – never ignore any girls in your vicinity, you never know when they might climb up on the sexy rating scale (whatever that is!)

It will be time to bid adieu to Goa soon. Just when I am getting into the groove, its Mumbai calling... bah!!!

Back....

2009-03-28T17:51:00.002+05:30

You can’t revive a blog whenever you want to. It either happens or it doesn’t. And right now, I am having one of those moments when you have stuff to say and you think it would be great if you could post a.k.a. vomit it on to your blog. I know it’s been ages since I last posted, but I haven’t been that busy really. Life has been interesting in the past year and a half or so when I’ve been away from the blog. So that means the only reason I haven’t posted is b’coz I am a lazy bum. We all are lazy bums, no? Now that I am home with almost nothing to do and I have stuff to say, I think it’s a good time to bring the blog back to life.

So you drag yourself out of bed at 5 am hoping to see New Zealand like 380/8 and you switch on the TV and you see 410/4 and you realise the difference between dreams and reality is as wide as it can ever be. There has been some criticism of Sehwag’s captaincy when it comes to field placements and bowling changes. It’s unfair to the guy, b’coz he never uses his brain when he bats and he cant be expected to use it when he fields. And when Yuvraj drops a dolly and someone as boring as Franklin hits 52 and a number of edges go thru the slip and gully region, its not really Sehwag’s fault. The real blame should be on Dhoni and Dhoni alone because if he was playing, things may have been different. The best part of the day’s cricket (if you are a sadist) is watching Charu Sharma and Arun Lal discuss the day’s play after stumps. I pity them. Poor guys have no clue what is happening and they are expected to discuss it for I think, like an hour, or maybe more. It’s like Atal Behari Vajpayee and Manmohan Singh discussing Salsa and Tango. Watching it for like 5 minutes proved to be too much for me, and I am glad someone invented the remote control and I am glad we have other TV Channels.

I finished the book ‘You are here’. It’s a funny name for a book. You are here. I’m sure the sequel will be called ‘You are there’ or ‘You have moved’ or better still ‘You are now here’. The author’s name is Meenakshi Reddy Madhavan. Seriously, that is the name. From the name, it sounds like she is either a Kathak danseuse or the author of some research paper titled ‘The study of the effects of algae on water purity in Lake Chihuamuhua’. I just realised that the book title “You are here” has 10 letters and the authors name has 22 letters. The book has Meenakshi Reddy Madhavan on all the pages. I do hope she has a shorter version of that name in real life. Imagine saying “Are you okay, Meenakshi Reddy Madhavan?” or “Would you like coffee or tea, Meenakshi Reddy Madhavan?” or hearing “Hello, Meenakshi Reddy Madhavan here”. But seriously, what’s in a name? I just found it funny that a book called You Are Here would have Meenakshi Reddy Madhavan on all its pages.The book is cool. It is not about all the women liberation and all the feminist gasbag talk. The best part about the book is that it is honest. There are parts of it I can identify with and a lot of it makes sense to me. Now if I can identify with something, it really must be something no? It’s not autobiographical or anything of that sort, and it’s not some story that goes on and on and ultimately ends, sometimes very abruptly. I used to read her blog once upon a time, back in the days when I would religiously read everything in my Google reader, and the book is just an extension of her blog. Her blog is a great read, and the book although a toned down and fictionalised version, is also easy reading. It does get boring at times, but then everything does. Happy I finished the book. It’s one of the few books I have started and finished lately. The same goes for movies. I have never been a movie person. I start to watch a movie at home and I always end up not finishing it either because something more interesting comes up, or its gets so boring that I have to make something more interesting to please come up. The only movies I finish are ones that are watched in the movie hall.

I saw this band called Faridkot on Channel V Launchpad and I loved them. Check them out, the lead singer Inderpreet Singh is cool ...

P.S. As I type this, Arun Lal and Charu Sharma are back on TV. What happened to superheroes? Paging for Superman or Batman or Spiderman, someone needs to be rescued guys... help!!

Guitars

2008-06-29T09:01:00.002+05:30

Why guitars are better than....

Men

_________________

* Guitars don't work late.
* Your Guitar stays as clean as you want it to.
* Guitars don't have parents or kids.
* Guitars don't get sick.
* Guitars don't get overweight, unless you like the Jumbo style.
* If you say bad things to your Guitar, you don't have to apologize before you play it again.
* Your Guitar always has time for you.
* Guitars don't watch TV.
* Guitars never need a shave, nor do they have hair on their backs.
* Guitars don't snore.
* Guitars don't leave a mess in the kitchen or bathroom.
* If you don't like the length of your Guitar's appendage you can get a new one.
* You can try out as many Guitars as you like before you get your own.
* You don't have to feed your Guitar.
* Guitars never argue, you are always right.
* Guitars never wake you up in the middle of the night, for any reason.
* Guitars never try to show you off to their friends.
* Guitars don't come home drunk after a night out with the other Guitars.
* Guitars don't sneak around with other Guitars.
* Guitars don't care what you look like or what your age is.
* Guitars don't care and don't comment about what you spend your money on.
* Guitars don't care if you have to work late.
* When you're playing, your Guitar doesn't care if other Guitars are bigger or better.
* Guitars don't care about their performance.
* Guitars don't get you pregnant.
* Guitars don't have mothers.
* When you've finished playing, you can put it away.
* You don't have to praise a Guitar after playing it.
* Guitars don't sulk.
* Guitars don't bore you.
* Guitars don't abandon you at gatherings for more interesting players.
* Guitars don't have to prove anything.
* Guitars don't try to change you once you've bought them.
* Guitars don't get jealous of your male colleagues.
* Guitars never interrogate you.
* Second-hand Guitars don't brag about previous owners.
* Second-hand Guitars don't go to see previous owners when you're out of town.
* You don't have to explain to a Guitar if you don't feel like playing tonight.
* Guitars never put you down, yet you can put them down whenever you wish.
* Guitars don't complain if you wear "sensible" clothes.
* Guitars don't have egos.
* Guitars don't need remote control units.
* When you're lost you don't have to argue with your Guitar about stopping to ask the band for directions.
* When your Guitar is being played too slow, you can speed up.
* When you need someone to play with, your Guitar is happy to accomodate.
* You buy the tools your Guitar needs; it doesn't buy tools that never get used.
* You don't have to continually assure your Guitar that its string length is just right.
* You determine the length and frequency of playing, and you're always in control.
* Your Guitar never finishes before you do.
* Your Guitar doesn't complain about your going out to dinner with your women friends rather than staying at home with it.
* You never get helpful suggestions from your Guitar's mother.
* Your Guitars will allow you to play it even on Super Bowl Sunday.
* Your Guitar never complains if you put on a few pounds.
* When your Guitar is dysfunctional you know how to get it fixed (and know that it can be fixed).
* Your Guitar will never earn more than you do for the same job just because it's a Guitar.
* Your Guitar never spends a "night out with the Guitars" and comes home with a strange rash on its fretboard.

and last, but not least:

* Your Guitar will never turn into a beer bellied blob of wood and metal on the couch in front of the TV.

Why guitars are better than.....

Women
_______________

* Guitars don't get pregnant.
* You can play your Guitar any time of the month.
* Guitars don't have parents.
* Guitars don't whine... unless you want them to.
* You can share your Guitar with your friends.
* Guitars don't care how many other Guitars you've played
* Guitars don't care how many other Guitars you have.
* Guitars don't care if you look at other Guitars.
* Guitars don't care if you buy Guitar magazines.
* You'll never hear, "Surprise, you are going to proud father of a new Guitar" unless you go out to buy one yourself.
* If your Guitar is flat you can fix it.
* Your Guitar doesn't care if you never listen to it.
* Your Guitar won't care if you leave up the toilet seat.
* You don't have to be jealous of the guy who works on your Guitar.
* If you say bad things to your Guitar, you don't have to apologize before you play it again.
* You can play your Guitar as long as you want and it won't get sore.
* You can stop playing your Guitar as soon as you want and it won't get frustrated.
* Your parents won't remain in touch with your old Guitar after you dump it.
* Guitars don't get headaches.
* Guitars don't insult you if you're a bad player.
* Your Guitar never wants a night out with the other Guitars.
* Guitars don't care if you're late.
* You don't have to take a shower before you play your Guitar.
* If your Guitar doesn't look good you can refinish it or get new parts.
* You can play your Guitar the first time you meet it, without having to take it to dinner, see a movie or meet its mother.
* The only protection you have to wear when playing your Guitar is a decent thumb pick.
* When in mixed company, you can talk about what a great time you had the last time you played your Guitar.

and last, but not least:

* If you decide to part with an old Guitar, you don't have to give up half of everything you own.

__________________

Source - Brian the brilliant

Tagged!!

2008-06-16T07:53:00.007+05:30

After having blogged for about 875 years, i finally got tagged by Bachblue. This tag thingy is unfamiliar territory for me. So pray for me folks, i dont want to mess up on my first attempt. So here goes..

First the Rules for the Tag:

1. Link the person(s) who tagged you (Bachblue)
2. Mention these rules on your blog.
3. Tell about 6 unspectacular quirks of yours.
4. Tag 6 following bloggers by linking them.
5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger’s blogs letting them know they’ve been tagged.

The All Important Quirks Follow:

1. Lets start with the bed - the one place i have always wanted others to think i am good. I snore. I sometimes talk in my sleep. And i practice my football skills by kicking a lot. I dont know if i wake up a better footballer, but i very often wake up alone.

2. I dont drink. Not even beer. Maybe a very rare glass of wine. I am very much Goan though.

3. I bite my nails. I use a nail-cutter only for my toe nails. Toe nails are hard to bite off.

4. I prefer traveling alone to places i have never been to. Usually, a new place to me is like an unopened gift wrapped in layers of presentation paper. When i am alone, the thought process is more intense, and i have discovered, i experience the sights and the sounds a lot more intensely. When i am alone, the wind blows harder at me, the dogs bark louder, the traffic noises seem louder and adventure of being in an unfamiliar environment is much more real.

5. I am an addicted blog reader. I subscribe to about 500 blogs. And i read each one. Not always every word, but most of them. It hurts to click on the 'Mark All As Read' button when i have not read blog posts.

6. I have never washed my own clothes. And I am 25. I will be moving in to the college campus this week, so that will be my first experience with washing clothes. I hope i have been blessed with some innate talent in this department.

Its Tag Time !!!

I tag Monday's Child, Illusionaire, Jerusha, Kartik Kannan, IssacMJ, and anyone else who is interested.

What if?

2008-06-06T19:58:00.003+05:30

Imagine yourself on a bus ride.

You are enjoying the scenery and the cool breeze wafting in through the windows. A light drizzle has left the surroundings wet and green. Your eyes devour the beauty around. And then, the sights and the peace are interrupted by noise. There is commotion. Suddenly, someone tells you that you will die when the bus stops. Thats it. You will be shot when the bus stops and its no joke. You decide to fight back. You will not take it lying down. The bus stops. Gunshots are heard from the front, lost in the cacophony of wails and screams. Fighting back is a lost cause. Your heart sinks. Surrender and death is the only way out of this bus. You hear muffled prayers from the back. Reality dawns on you. You realize you are living the last few minutes of your life.

You think of all the people you have ever met, the people you loved, the dreams left unrealized, the hopes left shattered. Your mind does not know what to do. The past is full of regrets and broken promises. The future is full of uncertainty. The present is hard to keep the mind on. But the present will be over soon.

At this point, would you look back on your past and regret the fact that you haven't achieved anything worthwhile, and that you did not spend time with the people who mattered, doing what mattered?

Or would you worry about what will happen to you after you die?

Start Where You Stand

2008-05-31T17:00:00.000+05:30

By Berton Braley

Start where you stand and never mind the past,
The past won't help you in beginning new,
If you have left it all behind at last
Why, that's enough, you're done with it, you're through;
This is another chapter in the book,
This is another race that you have planned,
Don't give the vanished days a backward look,
Start where you stand.

The world won't care about your old defeats
If you can start anew and win success;
The future is your time, and time is fleet
And there is much of work and strain and stress;
Forget the buried woes and dead despairs,
Here is a brand-new trial right at hand,
The future is for him who does and dares,
Start where you stand.

Old failures will not halt, old triumphs aid,
To-day's the thing, to-morrow soon will be;
Get in the fight and face it unafraid,
And leave the past to ancient history,
What has been, has been; yesterday is dead
And by it you are neither blessed nor banned;
Take courage, man, be brave and drive ahead,
Start where you stand.

innovative media ideas hit Goa!!

2008-05-20T20:30:00.003+05:30

The Times Of India - Goa edition carried photos and a writeup of a 21st Birthday party on Page 3. Very innovative indeed. Brilliant ideas like these were what the Goan media were lacking until May 20, 2008 (today).

It could be due to a lack of quality parties in Goa. Combined with a ready availability of too much paper and too much space.

Better still would be a helpline where we could call them over to celebrate our events - the puppy dog's birthday, weddings of distant cousins, wedding anniversaries, house inaugurations, cross feasts and litanies :-)

Hum do, hamare do..

2008-05-20T10:16:00.003+05:30

Amrita has a nice post on Aishwarya Rai at Cannes. I loved this picture. The family picture in Cannes. Amitabh looks lost, Abhishek looks like the face-saving father and Amar Singh looks like those family servants who accompany their masters to every function in town.

Matrimonial ads from some of the most eligible folk in town

2008-05-20T09:33:00.004+05:30

Got the following email. Don't know if these are actual posts on Shaadi.com. But they are amusing enough. Have fun!

Bravery awards should go those who can spent 3 hours on a 'date' with any of these posters.

=====================================================

These are ads taken from shaadi.com - guys searching for brides.These
are actual ads on a matrimony site. Grammar and spell errors have no
place in a

profile description as everything is straight from the heart!
Disclaimer: I

am not responsible if you forget your basic grammar after reading
this.....~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ -

Hello To Viewers My Name
is Shekhar , I am single i don't have female, If anyone want to Marie
to me u can visit to my home. I am not a good education but i working
all field in bangalroe.. if u like me u welcome to my heart...whenever
u want to meet pls visit my resident or send u letter.. Thanks yours
Regards Shekhar ~*~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~i want very simple girl. from brahmin educated family from orissa
state she is also know about RAMAYAN, GEETA BHAGABATA, and other
homework
(Homework?)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Wants a woman who knows me better and can adjust with me forever.
she may never create any difficulties in my life or her life by which the entire
life can run smoothly. thank you (The principle of running life smoothly was
never so easy!)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
she should be good looking and should have a service. she should have one
brother and one sister. she should be educated. (ain't it unique !! 1
brother 1 sister criteria)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person. Enjoys every moments of life. I love to
make friendship. Because friendship is a first step of love. I am
looking for my dreamgirl who will love me more than i. Because i love
myself a lot.

If u think that is u then why to late come on ........hold my hand
forever !!! (The dilwale dulhaniya
effect)~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~i
am simple boy.I have lot of problem in my life because of my luck now i
am looking one gal she care me and love me lot lot lot (I don't know
why but this is one of my favorites)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My wife should be as 'Shivani' as in Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki and as Tanwerr as
in KSBKBT...... (Ok I haven't seen these soaps but I am sure he must be
demanding too much,ain't he?)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i want a girl with no drinks if she wants she can wear jeans in house
but while stepping out of house she should give respect to our cast (by
not wearing her jeans? Wat the freak...)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I AM A GOOD LOKING BOY,WHO HAS THE CAPABILITY TO MAKE
ANY BODY TO LOUGH.I BELIEVE IN GOD AND ACCORDING TO ME FRIENDS ARE THE
REAL MESSENGER OF GOD. THE 3 THINGS I AM LOOKING FROM A GIRL ,THEY ARE
1.THEY MUST BELIEVE IN GOD.2. THEY HAVE TO LIKE MY PROFFESION AND THEY
SHOULD NOT GET BORED WITH ME WHEN I WILL TRY TO MAKE THEM LOUGH.(all of
us are loughing)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~ whatever she may be but she should feel that she is going to be
someone bride and she must think of the future life if she is too like
this she would be called the woman of the lamp (I am clueless, I feel
so lost. Can anyone tell me what this boy wants)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
love my patner i marriage the patner ok i search my patner and i
love thepatner ok thik hai the patner has a graduate ok(I am again
clueless but I liked the use of "ok". The person is suffering from
"Ok-syndrome")
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am pran my family history my two brother two sister and Father&mother
sister complity marred (somebody please explain in comments section how
to get married 'completely'?)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I am very simpel and hanest. i have three sister one brother and parent. iam
doing postal sarvice and tailor master my original resdence at
kalahandi diste naw iam staing at rayagada dist. (actually what is this
guy
doing?
Postal service or
tailor.??)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
my name is muhamad and i am unmarried. pleaes you marrige
me pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes (height of
desperation!)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I want one girl who love me or my mother. she love me heartly or she havea
frank she's skin colour 'normal'not a black or not a whitey. IThink the
main think is heart if your heart is beautiful then you are
beautiful.but iam not a handsome guy or not a good looking. but my Mom
say that Iam a good guy. My father already expired . THE CHOICE IS
YOUR. bye bye.(uttama
purushan)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

iam kanan. i do owo businas.one sistar.he was marred.(No comments)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I AM LITTLE FAIR INDIAN COLOUR. I DON'T HAVE ANY HABIT.(maybe the poor
guy meant BAD habits)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
hello i am a good charactarised man. i want to run my life
happily.i divorced my first wife.her charactor is not good'. i expect
the good minded and clean habits girl who may be in the same caste or
other caste accepted ... (but credit cards not
accepted..???)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i'm looking out for who lives in bombay , girl simple who trust me lot
should be roman catholic, LOVE ME ONLY. (Now that criterion is a must,
isn't it?)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

to be married on jan-2006. working woman perferable(this guy has fixed the
marriage date too! But he is yet to find a bride.I wish him best of
luck on

behalf of all of us. I am sure he will get one soon.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I would like a beautyfull girl. and i do not want her any treasure.
because girl is the maharani. (Now she is going to be a lucky girl! Any
takers?)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

failed three times and worked with privated ltd company which not paying
salary at present. (Any takers again?) -- DT

Dedicated to Mama

2008-05-15T10:32:00.002+05:30

My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION:
“Just wait until your father gets home.”

My Mother taught me about RECEIVING:.
“You are going to get it when we get home!”

My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE:
“What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you…Don’t talk back to me!”

My Mother taught me LOGIC:
“Because I said so, that’s why.”
&
“If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you’re not going to the store with me.”

My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE:
“If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.”

My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD:
“If you don’t pass your spelling test, you’ll never get a good job.”

My Mother taught me ESP:
“Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you’re cold?”

My Mother taught me HUMOR:
“When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”

My Mother taught me how to BECOME AN ADULT:
“If you don’t eat your vegetables, you’ll never grow up.”

My Mother taught me about SEX:
“How do you think you got here?”

My Mother taught me about GENETICS:
“You’re just like your father.”

My Mother taught me about my ROOTS:
“Do you think you were born in a barn?”

My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE:
“When you get to be my age, you will understand.”

My Mother taught me about JUSTICE:
“One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you. Then you’ll see what it’s like.”

My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL:
“If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”

My mother taught me FORESIGHT:
“Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”

My mother taught me IRONY:
“Keep crying and I’ll *give* you something to cry about.”

My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS:
“Shut your mouth and eat your supper!”

My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM:
“Will you *look* at the dirt on the back of your neck!”

My mother taught me about STAMINA:
“You’ll sit there until all that spinach is finished.”

My mother taught me about WEATHER:
“It looks as if a tornado swept through your room.”

My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS:
“If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you, would you listen then?”

My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY:
“If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times: Don’t Exaggerate!!!”

My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE:
“I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”

My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION:
“Stop acting like your father!”

My mother taught me about ENVY:
“There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do!”

====================================

Found the above here

Dear Shah Rukh Khan

2008-05-14T12:36:00.004+05:30

Dear Shah Rukh Khan,

The Eden Gardens is not a Bollywood movie theatre. And Kolkata Knight Riders is not a film directed by Farah Khan. So if the Knight Riders dont do well and die away in the IPL, there is no way they will be resurrected from the dead.

You can dance along the boundary ropes or in the stands with your cronies all you like but it still wont prevent your team from going down the drain. Your dancing and cheering does not cause your team to win, so cut the crap and move on.

Shoaib Akhtar wont save you (and your team) and neither will NDTV. It is sport. Not some Karan Johar or Farah Khan movie where you are hero.

As much as you are a hero in films, its high time you realise that life is a different ballgame.

God bless you.

P.S. - I would have been a Knight Riders fan but your excessive showmanship puts me and many others like me OFF bigtime. Go back to Panchvi Class mein fail or whatever that is or go back to doing films like Om Shanti Om and let us watch our cricket in peace.

Back

2008-05-13T21:50:00.005+05:30

Dearest Blog,

I remember sitting at a computer and writing unintelligible bullcrap (also called code) for 9 hours a day. The whole process (called programming) was too monotonous for my wandering mind. I was well on my way to becoming a redundant IC on the motherboard of computer. That is when you came into my life. I looked forward to parking my thoughts on you. My mind farted on you all the undigested thoughts it had ruminated on. You took it all silently.

I have good news. I am back.

Whether you like it or not, my mind will continue to fart on you.

Yours,
Me.

A few points to note after the Scarlett Keeling murder

2008-03-16T09:45:00.006+05:30

Much has been said and written about the Scarlett Keeling murder in Goa.

A few observations from my end (I know a lot has been said already about the case, but i have to revive my blog)

1) Much as we would like to blame this crime on outsiders (read as non-Goans), the culprits were very much Goan. So the hospitable and friendly Goans have darker shades to them and i am glad the world knows it well now.

2) There exists a murky network between drug peddlers and cops. Drugs are easily available in Goa. That is the truth.

3) Getting caught with their pants down in front of international media will not change the Goan cops. They are beyond repair.

3) To the single female tourist - If you do not go out alone at 4 a.m. anywhere else in India because you think it is unsafe, why go out in Goa?

4) To mothers of 15 year olds - You do not leave your 15 year olds alone in Goa. 15 year olds are never at fault. At 15, i wanted to try everything.

5) There have been murders and rapes of foreigners before in Goa, which have gone unreported. Some have been passed off as suicide or drowning cases. The reason the Scarlett Keeling murder got front page attention was because her mother chose to fight and the national and international media paid attention.

6) The press in Goa are a complete sham. Laughable. One of the three P's in Goa that compete with each other to be the prized puppets in the hands of the rich and powerful, the other two being the Politicians and the Police.

=======================================================

There are two many unanswered questions about the murder even after the Goa Police has claimed the case has been cracked. These questions will appear as headlines in the international media soon.

All men are not like that

2008-03-14T09:41:00.001+05:30

20-20 Cricket?

2008-02-01T19:03:00.000+05:30

Photo - Getty Images/Cricinfo

Greedy me

2008-01-23T19:27:00.000+05:30

In about nine hours from now, India take on hosts Australia at the Adelaide Oval.

The last time they were there 4 years ago, I was in the fifth semester of my computer engineering and had an exam in Computer Hardware Design that coincided with India's successful chase in the 4th innings. I decided to watch the match instead of studying. If i flunked the exam, i could take it again in 6 months. If India won the test match, i was not sure if i would ever get to see them win another test match in Australia. I got 9 marks out of 100 in the exam in a subject where i had scored 22 out of 25 in internal tests. It was worth the gamble. India won. I cleared the paper later.

India won in Australia again last week, this time in Perth. No exams this time. No bunking them either.

For the next 5 days i will pray for another win. Greedy me.

Confession

2007-12-17T18:29:00.000+05:30

Maybe public confessions give you some kind of closure. Maybe they put you in place when you mess up. Maybe they make you feel so ashamed of what you have done that your inner resolve to never repeat the mistake turns things in the long run.

I think its time to confess.

Here goes.

I had about 600+ unread items in Google Reader. I began the task of reading with enthusiasm but could not sustain the energy levels. I tried my best to finish but i could not. I know euthanasia is banned, but i did resort to the 'Mark All As Read' button.

Excuse the crap and move on

2007-12-01T08:55:00.000+05:30

I have been busy with exams. I still have 3 more to go. But for now i am just plain bored. So here i blog. I think the hibernation is over. I think i am back to normal programming. But you never know.

Blogging demands predictability - Predictability is boring - Hence, blogging is boring.

But no, wait! At the micro- level, i think (with an almost uncluttered mind) - Nah forget it. A few random thoughts swirling through my mind at the moment

To blog means to write. Write your own thoughts. Type what you feel in (long-winded) sentences giving the impression that you are one thinking specimen.

But what happens when your fingers are too slow to type what your mind is thinking? Too slow to keep pace with the thoughts swirling inside? What if your fingers are still at point A and the mind has reached E? What if your mind does not have the space and time to save points B, C and D?

B, C and D are lost. Now what? Anyways, i have no idea. I just think i have made my point. I think my fingers are too slow.

I would like to end it here. I am just so bored. I thought i should post something here. So i typed this out. Excuse the crap and move on.

Its all about counting your blessings

2007-10-05T18:07:00.000+05:30

Those of you who take good cricket commentary for granted should watch the live telecast of the India v/s Australia on DD National.

I love cricket commentators. And i take this opportunity to thank them all for NOT making a cricket match sound so intolerable unlike some of their peers on DD National.

----------

Free Burma

2007-10-04T07:51:00.000+05:30

Change the music....

2007-09-25T12:21:00.000+05:30

This was the moment when a billion hearts stopped.
So did the music.

But about one second later, the music resumed.

Please stop playing that awful "Chak de India" song each time an India win is in sight. Please.

The tune of the song reminds me of some of those 'golden oldies' - randomly composed songs with the choicest expletives for lyrics - that served as the anthems to be sung aloud by a bunch of croaking guys, to assert their supremacy and intimidate opponents at inter-school competitions.

I am not the only one who needs reminders!

2007-09-22T07:31:00.000+05:30

I signed up for an email reminder from National Geographic Channel which meant i would get an email in my inbox that would remind me to watch an episode about the hijacking of IC 814 and the hostage drama in Kandahar in the NGC series on Combating Terror. The programme was to be aired at 9.00 am and the repeat show was scheduled to be shown at 3.00 pm. The reminder email arrived in my inbox at 4.37 pm.

Sweet.

By the way, I watched the programme.

An Inspirational Professor's Final Lecture

2007-09-21T21:24:00.000+05:30

Dr. Randy Pausch, a Carnegie Mellon University computer-science professor, was about to give a lecture Tuesday afternoon, but before he said a word, he received a standing ovation from 400 students and colleagues.

He motioned to them to sit down. "Make me earn it," he said. They had come to see him give what was billed as his "last lecture." This is a common title for talks on college campuses today. Schools such as Stanford and the University of Alabama have mounted "Last Lecture Series," in which top professors are asked to think deeply about what matters to them and to give hypothetical final talks. For the audience, the question to be mulled is this: What wisdom would we impart to the world if we knew it was our last chance?

At Carnegie Mellon, however, Dr. Pausch's speech was more than just an academic exercise. The 46-year-old father of three has pancreatic cancer and expects to live for just a few months.

Continue reading here. Get to know Dr Pausch here.

Yuvraj Singh hitting Stuart Broad for 6 sixes in an over

2007-09-20T07:33:00.000+05:30

Yuvraj Singh hits 6 sixes in an over off Stuart Broad in the Twenty 20 World Cup match between India and England on 24th Sept 2007 in Durban, South Africa

Previous instances of 6 sixes in an over in cricket
- Gary Sobers of Northamptonshire off left arm pacer Malcolm Nash of Glamorgan in 1968
- Ravi Shastri of Bombay off left arm spinner Tilak Raj of Baroda in 1984
- Herschelle Gibbs of South Africa off leg spinner Daan van Bunge of Netherlands in the 2007 ODI World Cup.

Reality beckons ..

2007-09-18T18:03:00.000+05:30

Reality is an eye-opener. It could be gross. Something you don't want to see or hear or read about, but it is there. Somewhere. Beckoning you to take notice. And act.

There are times when i come across instances of grave injustice, stories of despair and horrid tales of misfortune.

Usually, I analyze the issue, jot down the options or solutions to the way out and discuss these with a few whose input and help will be valuable in making things easier for the victim. Sometimes it helps. Sometimes it does not.

The least i can do is blog about the issue. But i do not.

Which is why i loved this post. Please read it. We may have a female President but we have an issue on our hands.

Mandira Bedi and the pioneers of cricket commentary

2007-09-13T14:24:00.000+05:30

According to Mandira Bedi,

The likes of Gavaskar, Shastri, Wilkins are all pioneers in cricket commentary

Indeed. They did not ask her about batting. Else we would know who the pioneers of batting are. Tendulkar and Dravid and Ponting, of course.

Link on TellyChakkar via Kartik

And for some news....

2007-08-28T13:12:00.000+05:30

=====================

In the wake of the recent bomb blasts in Hyderabad, Government authorities are toying with the idea of recognising terrorist activities and legalising the same. Tenders will be floated in most Indian cities, and bids will be invited from major terrorist organisations from all over the world. The organisation that wins a bid for a clearly demarcated area will have the exclusive rights and permission to organise terrorist activities within the bounded limits of its allotted area. Experts believe this path-breaking step will go a long way in helping terrorist organisations find logistical, financial and infrastructural support and thus, the world will see much better planned operations. Investigations after a terror attack will be restricted to only the organisation which holds the rights to terror for the area.

=====================

The strike by the chickens, hens, and cocks of the country has been called off. The Indian poultry is delighted since 90% of hens that had stopped laying eggs during the strike have now resumed the same. The strike was called for in protest after a major Indian embassy official referred to the opponents of the Indo US nuclear deal as 'headless chickens'. The announcement to call off the strike was made after a major Hindi news channel ran the headline "Sansadon ko nahi kaha murga" which when translated into English meant "Parliamentarians not called cocks". The chickens, hens and cocks of the country appeared relieved after the statement by the news channel.

=====================

Bollywood film director and acclaimed academician and intellectual Karan Johar has been given honorary citizenship of Manhattan by the government of Manhattan. The honor was bestowed upon Johar after it was suddenly realised that he had done more to promote the culture of the great city of Manhattan than any other human being on earth. It is widely believed that Johar was the first proponent of the notion that whatever is cool has originated in Manhattan. After having associated the word "cool" with Manhattan, it is being speculated that Johar's next project will associate the word 'hot' with San Francisco. Rumour has it that Johar's next film has the current coach of the Indian national women's hockey team Shah Rukh Khan in the lead role with Johar himself playing the opposite lead.

=====================

P.S. -> Please take the above with a pinch of salt

Riots

2007-08-10T19:05:00.000+05:30

We have very religious people in India. Taslima Nasreen had flower pots and chairs thrown at her. Dan Brown had to face flak over the Da Vinci Code (Da Vinci got away because he is dead). A student of art in Baroda was thrown in jail for doing his work assignment. People are so religious we even have riots where people of the other religion are burnt alive.

I wait for the day when riots will break out over other things. Like dietary habits. The day when a news report will go -

The non-vegetarians and the vegetarians were involved in a major clash today. On Highway 16, the vegetarians burnt down a truck carrying 45 non-vegetarians. The National Party of Vegetarians has regretted that a few eggetarians were also burnt in the melee. The Eggeterians and the fishetarians meanwhile, have been trying to form seperate factions of the Non-Vegetarians Alliance.

Hard

2007-08-02T07:21:00.000+05:30

Its hard to grumble. Hard to complain. Hard to be sorry.

All you have to do is look out of the window and you will spot someone less fortunate than you are. You could have been him or her. Lucky you. Now smile.

Inspirational lines from Ali G

2007-07-29T22:24:00.000+05:30

To Victoria Beckham : Me mate Dave played one of your records backwards, and it sounded loads better

To Liz Hurley : Now Liz you is a bigtime porn star is you no?

To Madonna : Anyways, you is known as da Immaterial Girl. Is dat cos your talent is immaterial compared to your ability to get your kit off? But dat is a bit stupid, innit? Every time I sees you, you ain't even wearing any material

To Elton John : you looked a total dic in the seventies wiv da shades but everyone looked like dics in da seventies

Problem

2007-07-27T11:11:00.000+05:30

I have a short interest span. It is so short; i end up losing interest in the subject of my post as i approach its end. So most posts on various subjects are left abandoned as saved drafts. Which is unforgivable. And I do not have the patience to go back to them. Nor the inclination. But there is a guilt feeling somewhere.

coz there aint anything better coming here

2007-07-23T21:28:00.001+05:30

Some Muzik..

Majority v/s Minority

2007-07-20T22:03:00.000+05:30

A group of children were playing near two railway tracks, one still in use while the other disused. Only one child played on the disused track, the rest on the operational track. The train is coming, and you are just beside the track interchange. You can make the train change its course to the disused track and save most of the kids. However, that would also mean the lone child playing by the disused track would be sacrificed. Or would you rather let the train go its way?

Let's take a pause to think what kind of decision we could make................
Most people might choose to divert the course of the train, and sacrifice only one child. You might think the same way, I guess. Exactly, I thought the same way initially because to save most of the children at the expense of only one child was rational decision most people would make, morally and emotionally. But, have you ever thought that the child choosing to play on the disused track had in fact made the right decision to play at a safe place?

Nevertheless, he had to be sacrificed because of his ignorant friends who chose to play where the danger was. This kind of dilemma happens around us everyday. In the office, community, in politics and especially in a democratic society, the minority is often sacrificed for the interest of the majority, no matter how foolish or ignorant the majority are, and how farsighted and knowledgeable the minority are. The child who chose not to play with the rest on the operational track was sidelined. And in the case he was sacrificed, no one would shed a tear for him.

The great critic Leo Velski Julian who told the story said he would not try to change the course of the train because he believed that the kids playing on the operational track should have known very well that track was still in use, and that they should have run away if they heard the train's sirens. If the train was diverted, that lone child would definitely die because he never thought the train could come over to that track! Moreover, that track was not in use probably because it was not safe. If the train was diverted to the track, we could put the lives of all passengers on board at stake! And in your attempt to save a few kids by sacrificing one child, you might end up sacrificing hundreds of people to save these few kids.

While we are all aware that life is full of tough decisions that need to be made, we may not realize that hasty decisions may not always be the right one.

"Remember that what's right isn't always popular... and what's popular isn't always right."
Everybody makes mistakes; that's why they put erasers on pencils.

Courtesy - An email from Miguel Braganza

Culmination of life in general :)

2007-07-16T17:31:00.001+05:30

Thats it.

I have crossed a major milestone in my life today at 5.40 pm. It took me 24 years to get here. But it still feels sweet.

I got a friend request from this person on Orkut. There was no scrap preceding the request. I know girls get a lot of those, but i have decided that each time i get a random friend request i will post it here on the blog.

Now that i have got it, what more could i possibly want more ... I might as well go atop a building and jump down. Life feels like it has come a full circle.

If you want to know how fulfilling your life can be, mail that person at framework.tvcinema@gmail.com and request a friend request on Orkut. I promise you - nothing in this world will beat the orgasmic excitement you will receive when you get that friend request..

A discussion on science and evolution

2007-07-09T23:55:00.000+05:30

A brilliant and enlightening discussion on science, technology, homosexuality and the like moderated by a scholar and all in just 6 minutes...

Stray thoughts floating in my head....

2007-07-08T15:45:00.000+05:30

***
I am scared of surrendering to my passion. Thats because I love my passion more than myself.

***
Mental Intercourse is the biggest aphrodisiac.

***
I would rather meet Viren Rasquinha than Sania Mirza

***
The rain, the greenery, the sea, together with coffee, music and sport made an intoxicating combination.

***
Passion, not pedigree, will win in the end - Jon Bon Jovi

***
500 years done the line, no will remember that a Jason Monserrate ever existed so i better not work on creating a reputation and name for myself because in the long run its gonna be futile anyways!

***
If i can be there when you need me, thats more than enough.

***
The truth does not hurt all the time. Most times it is liberating.

***
A quote by John D MacDonald

Integrity is not a conditional word.
It doesn't blow in the wind or change with the weather.
It is your inner image of yourself,
and if you look in there and see a man who won't cheat,
then you know he never will.

***
I am happy. I always am. I will always be. There are more reasons to laugh than to cry.

***
I'd rather be there during the bad times than the good ones. I always side with the underdog. During the Wimbledon final yesterday, I had no favourites. However, at the end, I wished Bartoli had won. But only after I saw her tears after the match.

***
Beggars are human. Criminals are human. Everyone has a soft side that is unexplored.

***
Everything is interesting. Life is. People are. The world is.

Random ramblings for a change

2007-07-06T20:11:00.001+05:30

This blog is primarily a place for mindfarts. Mindfarts are periodic emissions of stray thoughts (garnished with sarcasm or scorn or whatever topping you choose) caused by the accumulation of too much matter in the mindosphere.

You know the feeling you get when it dawns on you that the possession you have always coveted and just very recently bought is not better than what you own currently and is not worth the exorbitant price you paid for it....

Simply put, you know the feeling you get when you have been coerced by this dude into buying this pair of jeans that looks cool in the mall mirrors but looks so 1870 when you look at it from the bedroom mirror and compare it to the other pairs in the closet...

I get the same feeling about having Pratibha Patil or Bhairon Singh Shekhawat as India's next President.

==========================

Now for something i am passionate about. Books. I am into non-fiction (Mindfarters can be into serious stuff). Strangely, all the four books i am into, at the moment have a strong fixation to India. Its history and people. Goa : A Daughter's Story, Maximum City, The Last Mughal and India in Slow Motion. And the next two books on the agenda are Ramachandra Guha's India After Gandhi and Dominique Lapierre's Freedom At Midnight

Given the unpredictable nature of the world in general and my mind in particular, that reading list is subject to change.

==========================

Eye Candy

2007-07-05T07:15:00.000+05:30

NOTE : Let all the videos download one at a time and then replay them .. Patience pays people!! I know its eye candy, but its all about the waiting if you know what i mean ;)

Tennis has eye candy for the guys...

And for the girls...

Lastly, Steffi Graf was never my favourite. She always beat the one. But when she can come up with a repartee like this one, you cannot help but smile...

Restaurant Attacked By Battlestar Galacticoz

2007-07-01T19:23:00.000+05:30

Nearly 100 activists of the right-wing extremist outfit Battlestar Galacticoz today barged in to the local Pao-Bhaji restaurant near the Municipal Market in the town center and smashed window panes and overturned tables, creating a huge ruckus in the entire process.

Most of the activists, clad in cheap imitation Galacticoz armor, and shouting slogans that sounded like 'Jai Batata Bhaji' and 'Jai Misal Pao', were young and full of enthusiasm in what they believed was the most important campaign in India since the 1857 Mutiny. The General Secretary of the organisation explained that the quality of food dished out at such outlets degraded national culture. Elaborating further, he said the general method of preparation and presentation was very Westernised and hence they decided to teach the owners and staff a lesson. The activists on their part believed that they were making a strong statement to all restaurant owners who did not adhere to indigenous processes and materials. Their believed their campaign will find support among the masses.

A few Galacticoz barged into the kitchen of the restaurant and bashed the cooks and cleaners, accusing them of using less sugar in the tea and using more Westernised ingredients in a majority of the other items on the menu. The activists demanded that the menu cards be altered and the word 'potato' be replaced by 'batata'. The restaurant owners however, refused to budge. They cited the rising cost for reprinting menus and suggested that the activists whack all the waiters and leave before any further damage to property ensued. Better sense prevailed after the Galacticoz were informed that the waiters were exponents of martial art and armed with forks and butter knives.

Champak Rammaiya (name changed to protect life), who owns a shoe shop in the same town center and was a witness to all the frenzied activity, said he hid all the pairs of Western shoes in his shop fearing he may be the next person under attack. In the chaos that followed, neighbouring shopkeepers downed their shutters till armed security personnel were posted in the area.

Reminiscent of the manner in which threats are issued by fundamentalist extremist Muslim terror groups to America and its allies, the Battlestar Galacticoz issued warnings to the World Bhelpuri Sellers Confederation to alter their menus to suit oriental tastes without incorporating any Western ingredients in their cooking, or else face the consequences. The Galacticoz have also issued similliar warnings to all ice-gola cart owners.

The rampaging mob left after a good 30 minutes of hooliganism, carrying with them sacks of potatoes, onions and other vegetables and fruits.

Things i do not understand

2007-06-29T21:22:00.000+05:30

I subscribe to about 400 blogs. They are all fun. Super fun. However, there are two types of blog posts i just cannot understand -

Type 1 Blog Post -
"I will be in Chammiyanagar on Jan 21, 22, 23 - I am free for coffee or dinner after 5 on 22nd. Anyone wanting to meetup can call me on 99_____"
Seriously, are you so starved for company?

Type 2 Blog Post -
"I will be going to Panipuri tomorrow. I plan to visit Disneyland and take all the rides. After that i will head to Dahipuri and then to Bhelpuri and blah and more blah and the whole itinerary"
What is the point of this? Dont you think saying you will be out of action due to travel from (date) to (date) would suffice?

==================

By the way, just to inform those people who give me an average of 4 hits per week (of which 2 are mine), i am heading to the toilet tomorrow from 6.45 a.m to 7.00 a.m. If any of you people are in the area and would like to meet up, send me an email.

Finally, relief

2007-06-29T16:41:00.000+05:30

Want to pee but you cannot? Use your keyboard to relieve yourself.

Appreciating the good things in life...

2007-06-28T09:23:00.000+05:30

This is for all the grumblers. For all the mentally deficient folks like me who fail to see the goodness in life and in BSNL Call Centers.

Guy Kawasaki had an issue, and on behalf of our beloved BSNL, i'd like to assure him that the service would have been much better had he called BSNL superheroes or BSNL superheroines!

Discrimination by telecallers

2007-06-19T17:50:00.000+05:30

T - Telecaller
========================

M : Hello
T : Is this Jason ____ from _______.
M : Yes
T : Sir, this is _____ calling from ICICI Bank credit card division, I got your reference from our database. Sir, i would like to inform you that you are eligible for a ICICI Gold Credit Card. to help you get one, we would like to know if you have an account in ICICI Bank..
(Long pause) ..
Do you have an ICICI Bank Account, sir?
M : Yes
T : Thats great. That just means things can be processed much faster. Can i have your account number sir?
M : Did i just say i have an ICICI Bank account?
T : Yeah
M : As a matter of fact, i dont. I just have this habit of saying yes all the time. I prefer saying Yes to saying No but sometimes i have no choice like now.
T : Thats okay sir, not a problem. I understand you work in a private company?
M : Yes, i mean no.
T : Are you employed with a public sector undertaking?
M : No, i'm unemployed. Must everyone be employed to have a credit card?
T : Yes sir.
M : Okay ... i'm self-employed.
T : But the database says you work with ______ .
M : Thats just a fake name of my company.
T: A fake name?
M : Yes. Our business model is so secret we have to protect it by changing our names so rivals cant track us. And its not the fault of your database. Its time we all be fair to computers. Even they can make mistakes. At our firm, we always respect and encourage our computers.
T : So what is the real name of your company?
M : 'Shootout at Lokhandwala'
T : Excuse me sir, can you repeat that?
M : 'Shootout at Lokhandwala'
T : Can you hold on for 2 minutes Sir, while i consult my superiors?
M : Sure, have fun
[After about 5 minutes]
T : Hello Sir?
M : Yes
T : whats the kind of business you are into?
M : Extortion. And some distortion.
T : Okay. Thats good. Can you tell me more about what is the kind of work you do?
M : See, we have clients in the middle east who outsource work to us, and our job is to procure resources to enhance the portfolios of our clients.
T : What kind of resources?
M : Bulls.
T : Bulls?
M : Yeah bulls. We organise 'dhirio'. You know bull-fights? [Dhirio is the Konkani word for bull-fights]
T : Where is this?
M : All over the world, but our main office is in Lokhandwala.
T : Can you give me the phone number of your Goa office sir?
M : In Goa, we work from a cowshed. We stopped using a landline. We did have a phone earlier, but we disconnected it after the bulls began to use it as the potty-place.

***** Phone is disconnected by T*****

Cute gals have weapons - Proven

2007-06-19T14:32:00.000+05:30

Chat with H on MSN.

Me : women who dont fart audibly are called perfect gentlewomen. You are a certified silent farter
She: ... oh boy, that's not me at all. Wanna hear me fart?
Me : No
She: i am actually a certified silent killer, my silent ones can kill a battalion
Me : This is going on my blog
She : what is? silent killer?
Me : yeah
She : OMG. But you will say I am cute right???
Me : should i?
She : of course. You should let ppl know cute gals have weapons

NOTE : - Do not panic if you are in the Northern Hemisphere. H is in Singapore.

Peter Jimmy Carter Ongondo

2007-06-17T22:50:00.000+05:30

To the one who reached my blog searching for Kenyan bowler having two middle names of american president

The answer is Peter Jimmy Carter Ongondo - Link

the pillar on which any society is built?

2007-06-17T21:51:00.000+05:30

"Dear Miss Melanie, I know when a journalist is killed in Iraq, his or her colleagues around the world provide support and raise their voices in outrage. But where are the voices of outrage of lawyers in other countries when a lawyer is killed for doing his job? Where are the great associations of law we hear about? Where are the great law firms? . . . Where are the law schools? . . . The help we need is not only the help of the government. We need the help of our brothers in the law."
Link

"destructive, there is nothing positive"

2007-06-17T21:46:00.000+05:30

Bishen Singh Bedi's take on Sunil Gavaskar

"He wants the glamour, the position and if there are any financial gains so much the better...but he does not want any accountability. He's always liked power without accountability - You tell me what his contribution has been. He is destructive, there is nothing positive"
Link

Uncensored Modesty

2007-06-15T10:38:00.000+05:30

The polite way of saying you are the best in India is to get someone else to say it. If you have been paddling around for a top job, getting a few political bigwigs to say you are the best person for the job helps. When the spotlight turns on you, just give a sheepish smile and say you are ready to accept the will of the people and if the people think you are the best, then so be it. This brings out your modesty. If there is any.

Karan Singh tells NDTV he is the best man for the job of the President of India. I wonder if that is the best way to put your point across. I know the cause was lost. Pratibha Patil was in the driver's seat, a bit too early perhaps. Karan Singh with his Zakir Hussain cap emphatically states that he is the best man among the nominees.

Had he been nominated, Kallu Mama would have said he is the best man for the job as well.

The best man is not the star. Rajnikanth is asked who is the bigger star? Rajini or Amitabh - Rajini retort 'I may be a king but Amitabh is the emperor' - Oh what modesty! And i have been thinking Amitabh was a farmer who keeps saying UP mein dhum hai!

The Idiot Box chronicles

2007-06-14T22:39:00.001+05:30

Yesterday i watched TV. You may be doubting it, but let me assure you, i am a human being too. But there are times when i am so swamped with things to do, i dont get time to do some of the more mundane things most humans do. Like watch TV *Or blog*

I do have time for Nat Geo Adventure though. But that comes before 8 am. So I flipped channels for about an hour. Bad weather meant that the reception quality for most channels was poor. Rather than blame my cable operator, i chose to blame the weather and convince myself there is nothing i can do about it. This way, i feel less lazier.

I zeroed in on the soaps on Zee TV, Sony and Star Plus. The creativity and talent on display in these serials probably goes unnoticed, because there are pertinacious folks like me who refuse to submit to the charms of these soap operas. Also, i need sufficient grounds to berate Ekta Kapoor for dishing out sensitive sudsers. Perhaps i could even make a blog post out of it where i could bring an episode under my satirical scanner. So i got set for an adventure ride of a lifetime.

I got into my comfy chair, clutched a soft pillow and was all set for a good time. I decided to watch one full episode of any soap opera, without changing channels midway (except during the commercial breaks).

The task was simple. Tolerate the programme for about half an hour. Just sit through it. Life's battles are far worse and some afford no other choice and sympathy and you have to face them. But this battle proved tougher than i thought.

I failed. I FAILED.

I changed channels thrice in the first 10 minutes before severe exhaustion of the nervous system took on over at the 11th minute and i quit the comfy chair, the pillow and threw in the towel (or remote) in 12 minutes. If it was a boxing bout with each round lasting till each commercial break, it would be safe to say i got knocked down just after the first round.

I do not understand many things in such soaps. I am serious. Can someone provide me non- sarcastic, fact ridden answers here.

Why does everything happen in slow motion? Mundane things like walking, eating, talking happen so slowly. It moves at a torturously torpid tempo. Why? Why is every female character dressed in fancy dress garb? Does everyone in India dress that way? Why is everyone so polite in the serials? You can predict if the character will say positive or negative stuff based on the background music and the dress of the actor. Why?

I switched to Channel V where they were showing reruns of the Get Gorgeous auditions. The three member jury consisted of this guy in the middle of two women and he was much more feminine than the ladies put together. The tall female to his right called Pia who is 'God knows who' is from the looks of it, God's greatest gift to humankind since Eve. And whats with these people who go for these reality show auditions making a shitty drama with tears and emotional crap - Chances are even the auto-rickshaw guy wont drop you to the bus station unless you stop crying and show him the money. So go get a life. And dont act as though its the end of life when you are rejected.

So if you are a toughie or think you are one, give the adventurer in you a real ride. If you wanna test your patience, stretch the limits of your tolerance, the boundaries of sanity, then do yourself a favour. Watch the soaps on Star Plus or Zee TV or Sony all day. Thats a real test of toughness and adventure spirit. Not some crazy group of bikers riding from Alaska to Patagonia. Or climbing Everest. Or swimming through the the shark infested Palk Straits.

Gems from the Times of India

2007-06-14T10:23:00.000+05:30

Someone posts anti-Shivaji balderash on Orkut. Shiv Sena attacks a cybercafe in protest. Baffled?
Dont be.

The Times Of India beats it.

They pick on this issue and a headline on the bottom of the front page of the Mumbai edition yesterday reads 'Shiv Sena doublespeak on website'.

The TOI has found the Orkut profiles of Shiv Sena chief's Bal Thackeray's grandsons Aditya, Tejas and Rahul. Any relation between the anti-Shivaji and anti-Shiv Sena camps and these Orkut profiles is not investigated/mentioned.

We are told about the friends and scraps each grandson has. Thank you. Invaluable information.
If Bal Thackeray has a profile on Orkut, what has it got to do with posters of Hate Shivaji communities?

And you thought people who did not bother figuring out the difference between a poster on Orkut and a cybercafe in Kalyan were weird.

The same TOI has a headline on the inside pages that goes like this -
'A Diploma In A Happening Field May Be A Better Investment Than A Five-Year General Post-Graduate Programme'

Whatever.

Just dont take this TOI thingamajiggy seriously. Please.

Life - The way it is

2007-06-12T20:27:00.000+05:30

Courtesy - Email from Marushka

Come on over!

2007-06-10T19:43:00.000+05:30

They - "Heya! Surprise! "

Me - "Hi.... whats up?"

They - "Today is Sunday. We knew you all would be home. So we came over."

Me - "Great. The real purpose of our life which is having you over on Sunday. The rest of the week we spent in our jobs. But thats a distraction from the real purpose. Now that you are here, life begins to make so much sense. "

Goa Assembly Elections - Results

2007-06-04T21:54:00.000+05:30

Goa went to the polls on Saturday. The results will be out by tomorrow noon. Amidst pouring rain, the state witnessed a 71 percent voter turnout.

I voted. For some strange reason, the guy at the booth painted my finger nail with that black ink. They normally make a mark on the nail to distinguish between those who have voted and those who have not. There was no reason for this guy to draw birds and trees on my fingernail. Probably i look like one of those dudes who hang outside the polling station, and wait for a chance to get back in again and cast another vote. I wonder if i look like a bogus voter. It must be my hair. I havent cut them in a while. Many guys in my area have long hair. But i'm the only one looking like Oprah Winfrey. Oprah does look like a bogus voter from behind. But the painting on the fingernail was bad. It will take atleast a year for me to erase that maniac's work of art. I felt like taking the bottle of ink and pouring it into his shirt pocket. Or better still, maybe down his throat.

The Assembly Polls witnessed 202 candidates battling it out for 40 seats. I'll post the results tomorrow once they are declared, which should be by noon.

Goa is a great place to live in if you are a satirist. Or if you are one of those guys who thrives on the ridiculous nature of people. Imagine the current crop of MLAs, barring a few who have not been indicted in a scam and accused of corruption (yet?), sailing in a boat to Gondwanaland and suddenly the boat sinks, who do you think will be safe?
Goa will be safe.

Meanwhile, do check Goa Votes 2007

UPDATE - Results

1: Mandrem-Goa

No. of Electors 20602
Polling Stations 23
No. of Contestants 7
Polling %age 80.01

Parsekar Laxmikant (BJP) 5858 35.54%
Khalap Ramakant (INC) 4148 25.17%
Manjrekar Shridhar (MGP) 2542 15.42%
Sangeeta Gopal Parab Ind 1949 11.82%
Palyekar Pradip D. Ind 849 5.15%
Devendra Deshprabhu Ind 679 4.12
Monteiro MeninoF UGDP 458 2.78%

Total Valid Votes 16483 100.00%
Lead Margin 1710

2: Pernem- Goa
No. of Electors 19349
Polling Stations 24
No. of Contestants 7
Polling %age 80.69%

Sopte Dayanand R (BJP) 7272 46.58%
Deshprabhu Jitendra (INC) 4827 30.92%
Teli Apa (MGP) 2873 18.40%
Gawandi Hanumant(ShivSena) 249 1.59%
Sanjay Krishnarao Prabhu Dessai Ind 183 1.17%
Smita Bharat Petkar JDS 122 0.78%
Asolkar Kishor (Ind) 86 0.55%

Total Valid Votes 15612 100.00
Lead Margin 2445

3: Dargalim- Goa
No. of Electors 16345
Polling Stations 21
No. of Contestants 4
Polling %age 79.67

Azgaonkar Manohar T(INC) 5049 38.77%
Morajkar Vithu B (BJP) 4275 32.83%
Parwar Kishor (MGP) 3465 26.61%
KorgaonkarSakharam(RPI/A) 233 1.79%

Total Valid Votes 13022 100.00
Lead Margin 774

4: Tivim- Goa
No. of Electors 27262
Polling Stations 25
No. of Contestants 8
Polling %age 72.48

Nilkanth Halarnkar (NCP) 8768 44.37%
Shet Tanawde SadanandBJP 8444 42.73%
Kandolkar Kiran Ind 1343 6.80%
Goveia Ludovico SagradoSGF 541 2.74%
Korgaonkar Indrakant D MGP 198 1.00%
Salgaonkar Umesh Shivsena 188 0.95%
Bepari Lala Ind 173 0.88%
Naik Vinayak Vithal JDS 105 0.53%

Total Valid Votes 19760 100.00
Lead Margin 324

5-Mapusa- Goa

No. of Electors 28344
Polling Stations 27
No. of Contestants 7
Polling %age 64.87

Francis D'Souza (BJP) 10104 54.95%
Subhash G. Narvekar JDS 3258 17.72%
Braganza Ryan NCP 2868 15.60%
Shriodkar Kiran MH MGP 1198 6.52%
Karekar Narayan S Ind 690 3.75%
Vernekar Prabhakar B Ind 158 0.86%
Hasotikar Sudesh RPI(A) 111 0.60%

Total Valid Votes 18387 100.00%
Lead Margin 6846

6-Siolim- Goa
No. of Electors 25674
Polling Stations 25
No. of Contestants 7
Polling %age 70.21

Dayanand Mandrekar BJP 7402 41.07%
Paliernkar Uday Ind 5400 29.96%
Marques Milton NCP 3845 21.33%
Fernandes Dorothy SGF 903 5.01%
Dabolkar Kiran MGP 223 1.24%
Sawant Mukesh M. Ind 172 0.95%
Dhargalkar Nilesh Morto Ind 80 0.44%

Total Valid Votes 18025 100.00
Lead Margin 2002

Nagvenkar Anandrao N Ind 144 0.66%
Vishwanath Rohidas H JDS 103 0.47%
Vasudev Keshav Halarnkar MGP 97 0.45%
Narvekar Umesh Suka Ind 57 0.26%

Total Valid Votes 21754 100
Lead Margin 3034

[Seems to be some mistake in the listing above, but that was
how I received it... probably a few extra lines]

7-Calangute- Goa
No. of Electors 27826
Polling Stations 29
No. of Contestants 4
Polling %age 70.08

Agnelo Fernandes INC 8319 42.66%
Joseph Sequeira UGDP 5558 28.50%
Malik Anjali ShrikantBJP 5381 27.59%
Naik Gajanan CPI 243 1.25%
Total Valid Votes 19501 100.00

Lead Margin 2761

8-Saligao- Goa

No. of Electors 22026
Polling Stations 21
No. of Contestants 6
Polling %age 69.95%

Dilip D. Parulekar BJP 6639 43.09%
D'Souza Wilfred NCP 4682 30.39%
Dmello Trajamo Ind 2290 14.86%
Sayed Salim SGF 1601 10.39%
Tulsakar Anand MGP 117 0.76%
Kanchan Arun Thool Ind 79 0.51%

Total Valid Votes 15408 100.00
Lead Margin 1957

9-Aldona- Goa
No. of Electors 31592
Polling Stations 32
No. of Contestants 9
Polling %age 68.86

Dayanand Ganesh Narvekar (INC) 9251 42.53
Kunda Chodankar(BJP) 6217 28.58
Fermeena Khaunte (Ind) 5298 24.35
Floriano Conceicao Lobo Goa Su-Raj 433 1.99
Salgaonkar Narcinva Ind 154 0.71
Nagvenkar Anandrao Narayanrao Ind 144 0.66
Vishwanath Rohidas Halarnkar JDS 103 0.47
Vasudev Keshav Halarnkar MGP 97 0.45
Narvekar Umesh Suka Ind 57 0.26
Total Valid Votes 21754 100.00
Lead Margin 3034

10-Panaji- Goa

No. of Electors 14937
Polling Stations 14
No. of Contestants 2
Polling %age 70.72

Manohar Gopalkrishna Prabhu Parrikar BJP 6004 56.83
Dinar Purshottam Kamat Tarcar INC 4560 43.17
Total Valid Votes 10564 100.00
Lead Margin 1444

11-Taleigao- Goa

No. of Electors 28993
Polling Stations 25
No. of Contestants 6
Polling %age 66.82

Monserrate Atansio J. UGDP 9641 49.77
Silveira Agnelo Mariano BJP 5619 29.00
Zuwarkar Somnath Datta Ind 3833 19.79
Kalangutkar Sudesh Raguvir Ind 135 0.70
Divkar Virendra Babuli JDS 84 0.43
Fernandes Rosario Caitan Ind 61 0.31
Total Valid Votes 19373 100.00
Lead Margin 4022

12-Santa Cruz- Goa
No. of Electors 29368
Polling Stations 29
No. of Contestants 9
Polling %age 69.19

Fernandes Victoria INC 7385 36.34
Hoble Anil Raghuvir BJP 6040 29.72
Monserrate Jennifer A. UGDP 5868 28.88
Pilarnekar Suresh SGF 582 2.86 213
Pandurang Kunkolkar Ind 123 0.61
Lopes Jose Ind 121 0.60
Shantinezkar Sunil MonoharShivsena 92 0.45
Fernandes Rony S. Ind 62 0.31
Shirodkar Av Avadout Ind 48 0.24
Total Valid Votes 20321 100.00
Lead Margin 1345

13-St. Andre- Goa
No. of Electors 22197
Polling Stations 25
No. of Contestants 4
Polling %age 68.64

Silveira Francisco (INC) 8593 56.40
Caiado Antonio Joao (BJP) 6074 39.87
Dessai Dongrikar Dilip (MGP) 286 1.88
Caiado Simon JDS 283 1.86

Total Valid Votes 15236 100.00
Lead Margin 2519

14-Cumbarjua- Goa
No. of Electors 27785
Polling Stations 35
No. of Contestants 4
Polling %age 73.13

Madkaikar Pandurang A (INC) 10016 49.29
Sawant Nirmala Ind 9445 46.48
Bhomkar Nilkant MGP 592 2.91
Fernandes Rodalph Ind 267 1.31
Total Valid Votes 20320 100.00
Lead Margin 571

15-Bicholim- Goa
No. of Electors 23176
Polling Stations 26
No. of Contestants 4
Polling %age 79.25

Patnekar Rajesh Tulsidas (BJP) 9352 50.91
Naresh Sawal (INC) 6657 36.24
Raut Pandurang Dattaram (MGP) 2092 11.39
Gad Vivekanand Save Goa Front 267 1.45

Total Valid Votes 18368 100.00
Lead Margin 2695

16-Maem- Goa
No. of Electors 19137
Polling Stations 21
No. of Contestants 4
Polling %age 82.08

Anant V. Shet (BJP) 5370 34.19
Zantye Pravin (INC) 4890 31.13
Pilgaonkar Milind Tulsidas (MGP) 4590 29.22
Fadte Prakash Jagannath (UGDP) 858 5.46
Total Valid Votes 15708 100.00
Lead Margin 480

17-Pale- Goa
No. of Electors 23559
Polling Stations 26
No. of Contestants 6
Polling %age 78.94

Gurudas Prabhakar Gauns (INC) 7768 41.77
Amonkar Suresh Kuso (BJP) 6177 33.21
Gawas Shamba (MGP) 4032 21.68
Christopher Fonseca (CPI) 291 1.56
Dessai Bhimrao Dajisaheb (Ind) 201 1.08
Paetkar Lavu Gurunath (ShivSena) 129 0.69
Total Valid Votes 18598 100.00
Lead Margin 1591

18-Poriem- Goa

No. of Electors 23252
Polling Stations 30
No. of Contestants 3
Polling %age 77.94

Rane Pratapsingh Raoji (INC) 10605 58.52
Vassudeo Ramnath Parab (BJP) 6869 37.90
Rane Rajendra Narayanrao (MGP) 648 3.58

Total Valid Votes 18122 100.00
Lead Margin 3736

19-Valpoi- Goa

No. of Electors 17669
Polling Stations 20
No. of Contestants 3
Polling %age 79.25

Rane Vishwajit Pratapsingh (Ind) 8590 61.35
Gaonkar Puti (BJP) 5041 36.00
Adv. Rohidas Sada Gonkar (MGP) 371 2.65
Total Valid Votes 14002 100.00
Lead Margin 3549

South

20-Ponda- Goa
No. of Electors 37068
Polling Stations 36
No. of Contestants 4
Polling %age 66.25

Naik Ravi (INC) 9972 40.61
Mamledar Lavoo (MGP) 8316 33.86
Khandeparkar Sandeep (BJP) 5940 24.19
Dias Santan (JDS) 329 1.34
Total Valid Votes 24557 100.00
Lead Margin 1656

21-Priol- Goa
No. of Electors 26635
Polling Stations
No. of Contestants 7
Polling %age 77.92

Dhavalikar Pandurang @ Deepak MGP 10591 51.03
Satarkar Vishwas (BJP) 6266 30.19
Jalmi Kashinath (INC) 3099 14.93
Gaude Sham (CPI) 324 1.56
Naik Rohidas Ind 196 0.94
Naik Uday (Shivsena) 169 0.81
Pramod Naik JDS 108 0.52
Total Valid Votes 20753 100.00
Lead Margin 4325

22-Marcaim- Goa
No. of Electors 24750
Polling Stations 28
No. of Contestants 5
Polling %age 77.49

Dhavalikar Ramkrishna Alias
Sudin Madhav (MGP) 12141 63.30
Govind Gaude (INC) 4532 23.63
Sadanand Naik (BJP) 1647 8.59
Ramchandra Govind Naik Mule Ind 549 2.86
Hanumant Vasant Naik Ind 310 1.62
Total Valid Votes 19179 100.00
Lead Margin 7609

23-Siroda- Goa
No. of Electors 25791
Polling Stations 31
No. of Contestants 3
Polling %age 77.17

Mahadev Naik (BJP) 9725 48.86
Shirodkar Subhash Ankush (INC) 9476 47.61
Khedekar Yeshwant Uttam (MGP) 701 3.52
Total Valid Votes 19902 100.00
Lead Margin 249

24-Mormugao- Goa
No. of Electors 28904
Polling Stations 27
No. of Contestants 8
Polling %age 61.16

Naik Milind Sagun (BJP) 7769 43.95
Vaz Giovanni Karl (INC) 5363 30.34
Shaikh Mohammed Eqbal (SGF) 2593 14.67
Metti Siddappa JDS 918 5.19
Sanjay Vasant Satardekar MGP 449 2.54
Parulekar Ravindra Vasant Ind 276 1.56
Yusuf Sheikh Ind 169 0.96
Kandu Narayan RamchandraRPI (A) 141 0.80
Total Valid Votes 17678 100.00
Lead Margin 2406

25-Vasco Da Gama- Goa
No. of Electors 32167
Polling Stations 27
No. of Contestants 9
Polling %age 59.32

D Souza Jose Philip (NCP) 7476 39.18
Arlekar Rajendra (BJP) 6864 35.97
Carlos J. L. Almeida JDS 3054 16.01
Rego Basilio Arnaldo UGDP 626 3.28
Servulo Barros MGP 279 1.46
Dhargawe Manisha Ind 253 1.33
Milton Barreto SGF 239 1.25
Kerkar Tara RPI(A) 216 1.13
Durbhatkar Jagdish (Shiv Sena) 73 0.38
Total Valid Votes 19080 100.00
Lead Margin 612

26-Cortalim- Goa
No. of Electors 34948
Polling Stations 34
No. of Contestants 4
Polling %age 63.45

Mauvin Heliodoro Godinho (INC) 9532 42.98
Mathany Saldanha (UGDP) 7850 35.40
Raymond Desa (SGF) 4452 20.08
Mallamma Bidari JDS 342 1.54
Total Valid Votes 22176 100.00
Lead Margin 1682

27-Loutulim- Goa

No. of Electors 22626
Polling Stations 22
No. of Contestants 3
Polling %age 65.69

Alexio Seqeira (INC) 6435 43.30
Fernandes Piedade Remegio SGF 4894 32.93
Dourado Pausilipo Eviaco EstivaoInd 3534 23.78
Total Valid Votes 14863 100.00
Lead Margin 1541

28-Benaulim- Goa
No. of Electors 23453
Polling Stations 24
No. of Contestants 3
Polling %age 66.83

Pacheco Xavier Francisco (NCP) 8092 51.63
John Fernandes SGF 7336 46.80
Theodore Fernandes Ind 246 1.57
Total Valid Votes 15674 100.00
Lead Margin 756

29-Fatorda- Goa
No. of Electors 32630
Polling Stations 26
No. of Contestants 6
Polling %age 60.73

Damodar (Damu) G. Naik BJP 7943 40.09
Vijay Sardessai INC 6172 31.15
Noronha Piedade Ind 3640 18.37
Ibrahim UGDP 804 4.06
Hazare Mahadev Narsinv MGP 793 4.00
Barretto Camilo SGF 463 2.34
Total Valid Votes 19815 100.00
Lead Margin 1771

30-Margao- Goa
No. of Electors 28142
Polling Stations 25
No. of Contestants 5
Polling %age 62.02

Kamat Digambar INC 9198 52.70%
Sharmad Raiturkar BJP 7170 41.08%
Jhonson Fernandes SGF 802 4.59%
Painginkar Sandeep MGP 162 0.93%
Palondikar M P (Babu)Ind 123 0.70%
Total Valid Votes 17455 100.00
Lead Margin 2028

31-Curtorim- Goa
No. of Electors 26552
Polling Stations 28
No. of Contestants 3
Polling %age 64.79

Aleixo Reginaldo Lourenco SGF 9320 54.18%
Sardinha Cosme Francisco C INC 7493 43.56%
Xavier Dias Ind 390 2.27%
Total Valid Votes 17203 100.00
Lead Margin 1827

32-Navelim- Goa
No. of Electors 34947
Polling Stations 36
No. of Contestants 3
Polling %age 65.79

Alemao Churchill SGF 13500 58.71%
Luizinho Faleiro INC 8996 39.12%
J. P. Coutinho UGDP 497 2.16%
Total Valid Votes 22993 100.00
Lead Margin 4504

33-Velim- Goa
No. of Electors 20405
Polling Stations 23
No. of Contestants 2
Polling %age 64.57

Rodrigues Filipe Nery (INC) 7965 60.45
Silva Benjamin (SGF) 5211 39.55
Total Valid Votes 13176 100.00
Lead Margin 2754

34-Cuncolim- Goa

No. of Electors 24150
Polling Stations 27
No. of Contestants 5
Polling %age 62.94

Alemao Joaquim (INC) 8909 58.62
Fernandes Jorson Piedade (UGDP) 3408 22.42
Gonsalves Milagres Methew (BJP) 1832 12.05
Rodrigues John J. (Ind) 758 4.99
Jerry Fernandes (Ind) 292 1.92
Total Valid Votes 15199 100.00
Lead Margin 5501

35-Sanvordem- Goa

No. of Electors 25553
Polling Stations 32
No. of Contestants 6
Polling %age 76.84

Anil Vasudev Salgaonkar (Ind) 10705 54.52
Vinay D. Tendulkar (BJP) 3782 19.26
Jog Jagadish Raghunath (MGP) 2957 15.06
Pradeep Tukaram Dessai (INC) 1766 8.99
Naresh Khusali Shigaonkar CPIM 275 1.40
Antao Menin Shivsena 149 0.76
Total Valid Votes 19634 100.00
Lead Margin 6923

36-Sanguem- Goa
No. of Electors 19677
Polling Stations 27
No. of Contestants 4
Polling %age 74.14
Gaonkar Vasudev Meng (BJP) 7754 53.15%
Minguelino D'Costa INC 5449 37.35%
Velip Anand MGP 963 6.60%
Alfred Fernandes Ind 422 2.89%
Total Valid Votes 14588 100.00
Lead Margin 2305

37-Curchorem- Goa
No. of Electors 28519
Polling Stations 30
No. of Contestants 7
Polling %age 70.32

Shyam G Satardekar (INC) 10628 52.99%
Dessai Ramrao Ghanashyam BJP 8729 43.53%
Rumaldo D'Costa (Ind) 201 1.00%
Khandekar Abhay Shambu JDS 173 0.86%
Gurudas Chandrakant Naik Ind 133 0.66%
Dessai Sapnesh Ganesh Ind 98 0.49%
Alexy Fernandes Ind 93 0.46%
Total Valid Votes 20055 100.00
Lead Margin 1899

38-Quepem- Goa
No. of Electors 28167
Polling Stations 34
No. of Contestants 5
Polling %age 75.47

Chandrakant Babu Kavalekar(INC) 9474 44.57%
Prakash Shankar Velip BJP 8311 39.10%
Pereira Raul SGF 2303 10.83%
Gaonkar Narayan Datta MGP 817 3.84%
Thulo Shanu Velip Ind 353 1.66%

Total Valid Votes 21258 100.00
Lead Margin 1163

39-Canacona- Goa
No. of Electors 20070
Polling Stations 24
No. of Contestants 4
Polling %age 75.51%
Pai Khot Vijay BJP 7577 50.00%
Bandekar Sanjay Vimal INC 6868 45.32%
Gracias Hemant BernardoSGF 464 3.06%
Fernandes Augustin L. UGDP 245 1.62%
Total Valid Votes 15154 100.00
Lead Margin 709

40-Poinguinim- Goa

No. of Electors 15604
Polling Stations 21
No. of Contestants 2
Polling %age 77.65

Tawadkar Ramesh (BJP) 6158 50.83%
Fernandes Isidore A (INC) 5958 49.17%

Total Valid Votes 12116 100.00
Lead Margin 200

Make Your Trip

2007-06-04T13:25:00.000+05:30

You are given 1000 Rupees and asked to travel as far as you can for 15 days. Hitch a ride, beg for food, sing and dance for money. Do all you can but travel as far as you can get. If you think a ride like that one will be fun, you need to check this out

Indian Cricket Team needs Rajan Bala as coach

2007-06-01T08:36:00.000+05:30

Here is a last ditch effort on my part, to pitch in for a rising star on the horizon of Indian cricket. From the looks of it, Dave Whatmore is set to take over the ruins (or reins?) of the Indian cricket team.

I have said what i am saying now in an earlier post. But this stupid blogger software keeps shoving it behind and further behind for some strange reason (behind in the archives i mean). We must not let Google and Blogger shove matters of national importance up Blogspot's behind.

Hence this post again for a man who needs no introduction. Because a mere introduction alone would not suffice. A man who has set precedents with his demeanour and class. A man who rightly deserves the Indian cricket team coach post but is not yet because as you all know, the forces of darkness are prevailing at the moment. The great Rajan Bala.

I strongly recommend Rajan Bala for the post of the coach of the Indian cricket team. Not without reason. But these are not the only reasons. There are countless unspeakable, inexpressible reasons that just are there deep in the trenches of every cricket lover's heart and butt. Here are a few obvious ones.

- He looks focussed. Our cricketers focus hard only at the crease, but Bala's gaze appears focussed all the time, as though he is expecting a Lasith Malinga bouncer from behind the curtains every minute of his life.

- His cricketing knowledge is better than anyone else living on planet earth in this century. Ask him any question, and he will reply with a good old Aussie anecdote.

- He heard it all when Vic Richardson took on Don Bradman, Trevor Hohns told Steve Waugh its time to pack up, Wally Hammond and Neville Cardus discussed eggs, and other instances like these. He may deny it, but i strongly feel his presence was the major motivating factor and source of strength and courage for conversation between them all.

- Greg Chappell text messages him at times. Batting tips will come from Greg, Under-arm bowling tips from Trevor, retirement tips from Ian, baseball glove buying tips from Greg's son Jon. So an all-round coach.

- His name is dangerous enough to scare the Indian players off any match-fixing aspirations.

- His bald dome poses less resistance to the absorption of new ideas and enhances the concept of an open mind.

- His pointed lips resemble those of Greg Chappell. Memories of sharp words for the Indian cricketers. The lips are the source of the tips and flips.

- His stare is very very unsettling, strong enough to unsettle any rival fielders fielding near the pavilion.

Some will argue that Bala has no cricketing experience. But he makes up for it with his sharp ears, his pointed lips, his bald dome, his clear voice, his steady gaze, his unsettling stare and his very underworld-don type name.

Its time to get behind him as one nation. As one body of one billion. Painted blue.

The Guys Rules

2007-05-31T08:16:00.000+05:30

Another Ctrl C-Ctrl V post all lifted from an email from Brian.

Finally, the guys' side of the story. We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. Our rules.

Men are NOT mind readers.

Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

Crying IS blackmail.

Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

You can either ask us to do something. Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions & neither do we.

ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as cricket, soccer, gadgets or software.

You have enough clothes.

Reality tonic

2007-05-29T13:55:00.000+05:30

A young doctor at AIIMS harassed because he was not born into a high caste family - here

And this mother who wanted to kill her severely retarded fifteen year old son - here

The Metro Files

2007-05-29T13:25:00.000+05:30

I am a fan of reality. So most Bollywood movies are not my thing. Unless they are startlingly real. If i make a movie, the unknown and the ordinary person, born in a rugged home, slogged all his life to earn a living, loved by his family, and died a death in oblivion will be the star. There will be no dancers in colourful skimpy clothes, no happy endings, no death defying action scenes, no multiple extra marital affairs, no palatial mansions, no huge families, no million dollar business deals and the sort.

Movies for me happen only when friends get together. I have a few things to say on the movie called "Life in a Metro". Yeah, that is the name.

Its a movie about seven Mumbai dwellers who seek love and acceptance as they wholeheartedly devote themselves to their dreams. It tells everyone that people in the metros sleep around. Silly actually. Because in India, we have no such thing as sex. Its immoral. Judging by how things are going, someday sex will be banned for good. But then in movies, they have sex. So if you are in a village or remote town, and have been sleeping with the buffaloes and the cows till now, you have to progress to the next stage. Move to the metro.

The Shiney Ahuja - Shilpa Shetty angle is good. Shiney is this divorcee who finds a great friend in a married Shilpa plagued by a cheating husband in Kay Kay Menon. Shiney and Shilpa do not end up together. Thank God for that. I mean happy endings are good, but happy endings are not always real. In real life, shit happens. Life is unpredictable. Shiney is one of those guys whose acting skills are as good as his looks. But he cant beat Kay Kay and Irrfan Khan in the acting department.

Irrfan is this 38 year old who has been shunned by the female community and left untouched in all his virgin glory only to picked up by Konkona Sen Sharma, who habitually gets attracted to closet gay men in movies. Irrfan is a brave dude. He races on a horse in Mumbai traffic but that bit is trivial compared to what follows. He enters the ladies compartment of a Mumbai train to hug Konkona. I think he could have waited outside. Oh and by the way, can 60 women packed in a ladies compartment, all smile and clap with both hands? For one thing, its hard to get 2 women to agree to something. But in the movie, they will do anything to make some happy endings happier.

Kangana Ranaut - > girl you are distracting. Its hard to focus on the movie when Kangana looks this good. That run through the streets in the end was fun :-) She dumps Kay Kay, her boss, for Sharman Joshi who is the proud keeper of the only empty flat in Mumbai.

Why do Dharmendra and Nafisa Ali take so long to get out of bed? I know Dharmendra is 71 and Nafisa will be 60 in August and senility may be setting in, but still, i think they took way too long. Most kitchens in Panjim restaurants close at 3.00 pm, and no amount of explaining the perils of senility can get the restaurants to delay their kitchen closing time. Anyways we did get lunch in the end. If Nafisa had died a little later, maybe we might not have.

What is it about some people who watch movies by getting so absorbed by them? It feels like they are inside the movie. They watch it with open mouths. The mouth gets opened wider and wider as the movie progresses. So wide, it feels like they are out to swallow the screen. Any screen where you can spot the nose hair in the actors is not small. Its like watching a tennis match and turning your head side to side as you catch up with the words emanating from the character on the left and the one on the right. A nudge is not enough to bring the lost souls back to reality. You can eat their popcorn and they wont notice. Sometimes its good to shake them for half a minute till they come back to reality and tell them its just acting. Its not real. Remember playing house as a kid and playacting. A bit like that. I had to remind Kunal in the middle of Rang de Basanti that the gun shots and the deaths was all acting. That guy gets inside the movie. I thought he would run to the screen and start shooting at the police officers with an umbrella or a pen for a gun. Thankfully, no gunshots in this movie.

Topi - Thats the Hindi word for cap. Thats also what they call a condom in the movie - A Topi. Is there a Hindi word for condom? I am not sure, but i have a feeling i have figured out the reason for our burgeoning population. Imagine this conversation between A and B

A - Mere 7 bacche hai. (I have seven kids)
B - Accha? Topi nahin pahente kya? (Dont you wear a Topi?)
A - Paheni to thi. Phir bhi. Pata nahi kaise. (I do, but still happens. Dont know how.)
B - Mein toh Adidas topi pahenta hoon. Abhi tak kuch nahin hua. (I wear a Adidas Topi. Nothing happened as yet)

Some serious Reviews - 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
The official site of the movie - here

Serious verdict - Watchable. Pretty realistic portrayals i would think.

Cricket Quiz - All the trivia buffs come on over

2007-05-29T11:14:00.000+05:30

Send me an email with the answers.
Email Id in my profile.

Educated in Lahore and Oxford, this multi-faceted cricketer scored a hundred at the SCG on his Ashes debut for England and later was employed in the Indian Foreign Service. Name him.

Name the only Test cricketer to have won a Olympic hockey gold medal.

Name any one Test Cricketer born in each of the following non-Test playing countries

1) Italy
2) Portugal
3) Hong Kong
4) Afghanistan
5) Malaysia
6) Mozambique
7) Swaziland
8) Peru
9) Egypt
10) Papua New Guinea
11) USA
12) Panama
13) Kenya
14) Zambia
15) Germany

Name the only player to have appeared in Test matches in both rugby and cricket for New Zealand.

He represented the West Indies in cricket and lawn-tennis, and also won the Trinidad & Tobago table-tennis singles title in 1949. Further to this, he also made it to the Trinidad & Tobago team in basketball and soccer. Name him.

India has been served by two players both in hockey and Test cricket. Name them.

Which Test cricketer has played soccer for both New Zealand and Australia?

The son of which cricketer represented his country in Rugby U-17 and Test cricket?

Which fast bowler was given the middle names Alexei and McNamara (after the Soviet and American politicians) by his father whose name was Kissinger? His sister is named Golda.

Which Indian cricketer is also a fingerprint expert?

The 1996 Wisden records say that "fried calamari stopped play" during a South African domestic match at Paarl in February 1995. What happened?

Which country other than Australia did both Mark and Steve Waugh both represent?

Who played against Brian Lara when he scored his 501 not out, and was West Indies' 12th man when he scored his 375?

After having found a place in the Australin team as a wicketkeeper for the 1890 tour of England, this cricketer tells the management that he has never kept wickets before once the team had safely embarked on their voyage. Name him.

Find a relation between the Toronto Blue Jays and the Indian cricket team with respect to the members.

An accomplished cricketer and coach, he devised Zimbabwe's car registration system and his sister captained the Zimbabwe women's field hockey team which won the gold medal in the 1980 Summer Olympics in Moscow. Name him.

Born two months prematurely and afflicted with meningitis when he was a few months old, he was given only a one in four chance of survival, but survive he did. However, although it was not realised for some time, he was left totally deaf by the disease. When he was four, he had an operation to regain his hearing. The operation was successful, but left him with terrible coordination difficulties. He was consequently some way behind his age group when he went to school. He worked as a installer of refrigeration and air conditioning units during this period of his career. He is related to a famous golfer. Name him.

Which big hitting all rounder has the name of an island country for a middle name?

She played 7 tests for Australia. Her brother played 41 Tests. Her husband has stood in 10 ODIs. Name her.

When he took the wicket of Michael Vaughan in his debut test, he became the first bowler for his country to take a wicket in his first international over. He died in a motor accident and is now the youngest Test cricketer to have died. Who is he?

Besides Graeme Hick, name the only other Test cricketer who was born in Zimbabwe but represented another country in tests.

Dave Whatmore and Jehan Mubarak are related in some unique manner to Sri Lankan cricket. How?

She was born in Canada, and played for Netherlands and New Zealand. Name her.

He played football at under-18 level for Scotland, and cricket for three countries. Name him.

Who is the the only known Test cricketer to have been executed?

Clayton Lambert and Faoud Bacchus have played international cricket for the West Indies and also played for the USA. Name another West Indian ODI cricketer who now plays for the USA.

Name the West Indies cricketer who has served as the Speaker of the House of Assembly and the President of the Board of Education in his country.

Hutch Eskimo Ad

2007-05-27T19:49:00.000+05:30

Check this out

Top ten books related to Goa

2007-05-27T15:41:00.000+05:30

I got this list from Goanet

1. Domnic's Goa: A nostalgic romp through a bygone era.
Author: Domnic Fernandes
Publisher: Abbe Faria Productions
Price: Rs 350.00
Year of publication: 2007

2. Butterflies of Goa
Author: Parag Ragnekar
Publisher: Mineral Foundation of Goa
Price: Rs 150.00
Year of publication: 2007

3. Snapshots of Indo-Portuguese History: Pangim
Author: Vasco Pinho
Publisher: Vasco Pinho
Price: Rs Rs 295
Year of publication: 2007

4. How To Be An Instant Goan
Author: Valentino Fernandes
Publisher: Diamond Publications
Price: Rs 150
Year of publication: 2006, 4th edition

5. Goa: A Daughter's Story
Author: Maria Aurora Couto
Publisher: Penguin
Price: Rs 495 (hb) Rs 350 (pb)
Year of publication: 2004

6. 100 Goan Experiences
Author: Pantaleao Fernandes
Publisher: The Word
Price: Rs 395
Year of publication: 2006

7. Window on Goa: A History and Guide
Author: Maurice Hall
Publisher: Cimino Publishing Group
Price: Rs 695
Year of Publication: 1995

8. The Parish Churches of Goa: A Study of Facade Architecture
Author: Jose Lourenco
Publisher: Amazing Goa Publications
Price: Rs 495
Year of publication: 2006

9. An Historical Sketch of the City of Goa
Author: José Nicolau da Fonseca
Publisher: BR Publishers (Post-copyright reprints)
Price: Rs 575
Year of publication: 2006, originally published in 1878

10. Tivolem: A Novel
Author: Victor Rangel-Ribeiro
Publisher: Milkweed
Price: Rs 495
Year of publication: 1998

Lessons from a pencil

2007-05-15T09:44:00.000+05:30

It tells you that everything you do will leave a mark

You can always correct your mistakes

What is important is what is inside you and not what is on the outside

Sharpenings are painful, but they make you a better person.

To be the best, you must allow yourself to be held and guided by the hand above you.

Lessons from a pencil was sent to me as a text message. No idea who the original author is.

Female travel partner wanted for young handsome smart male

2007-05-03T14:57:00.000+05:30

you are looking for a female travel partner? Welcome!

Here are 6 things to remember if you are a 'young, handsome and smart' also called as 'YHS' males who travel alone and are actively on the hunt for travel partners (preferably female) for sharing and friendship and blah-blah-blu-blu and the like..

1) If you go out alone at night, and are walking on a lonely road to your hotel room, make sure you roll your eyes in all angles and keep your ears open for any movement that occurs in the bushes and trees beside the road. Some sex-starved female ape could pounce on you and bite your **** off!

2) When you have the inevitable option of choosing a female travelling partner (its obvious that a YHS guy will have them banging the front door down), be very careful. Most females will only look to sleep with you. Obviously, the whole world knows that a guy like you will not be looking for something physical, but incase she takes more interest in you than in the tourist attractions, dont worry. Do Swami Ramdev's Relaxasan. Very helpful.

3) If a female (actually any living creature that even remotely resembles one) offers to buy you a drink at this happening pub/disc/bistro, always refuse. You never know the drink could be spiked with some lame Viagra type intoxicant. If at all she insists on buying you a drink, tell her to come the next morning at 7 am outside the local railway station and buy you tea from Ramu's tea-stall. Ramu only puts water in the tea and there is never a chance of any unwanted addition except for sugar. (To be on the safer side bring on your sugar, very cheap, half kilo only 8 rupees)

4) The message
"Hi friends, My name is Billoo and I am mid-40s smart young handsome male looking female for travelling and also fun and adventure. Reply soon"
you posted on the Travel Forum will attract a lot of replies. So make sure you regularly check your inbox and delete once you read, so it does not get full and you dont lose out on important emails later. Do not give your your name out in any email. You can give your phone number though. Maybe you could attach a snap of some Hindi film actor. Most YHS look the same. Approximately.

5) If any girl or hotel roomboy makes fun of you, learn to take it well. Remember to laugh. Sense of humour is appreciated always, especially by female travel partners. Keep your confidence high. You are YHS - Young, Handsome, Smart. But what really matters is if you are male. If you are male, that is 60% of the battle won. You may not be very Young, very Handsome, very Smart but these are all not as important as you being male. You must be a complete male like that person from Raymond's Suitings Advertisement.

6) Adjust your underwear through your pant like no one is watching and fart like no one is hearing. Whether it is sweaty arms, or a dome-shaped belly, just be yourself. When you get to the beach in Goa, make sure you enter the water with your shirt on your body. Dont expose your body cheaply. Our culture will not allow it. In India, our moral standards are high.

Happy travels and fun and adventure.

=================================================

You have been searching on Google for "female travel partner". Dont say no. You naughty one. I can see it in your eyes. Ok, here's the scoop. On the 31st page of the search results in the 4th link that is displayed, you will come across a wonderful and one-of-a-kind site called www.i-am-a-female-travel-partner-and-you-can-have-me-now.com
Try that site. 100% guaranteed satisfaction. All problems solved.

Crazy Fiction

2007-04-25T09:11:00.000+05:30

You must have heard this one before.

You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy,
the best golfer is a black guy,
the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese,
the Germans dont want to go to war,
guys named Bush and Dick are in charge of America,
the next guy who could be in control has names that rhyme with Iraq and Osama and a middle name 'Hussein',
K-Fed teams up with Paris Hilton while Britney teams up with Sanjaya Malakar,
and i decide to write fiction.

My first attempt at fiction. I know its small. All great things start small anyway. Even Sanjaya Malakar was a tiny sperm cell one time.

===================================================

Once upon a time, there lived a boy.

He asked a girl he liked 'will u marry me?'

'No' said the girl.

And the boy lived happily ever after.

He played cricket and soccer and golf, went fishing, went out at night, partied, drank beer and farted whenever he wanted.

===================================================

Inspiration for the above work of literature was derived from a text message i received this morning.

Understanding Reality

2007-04-25T08:25:00.000+05:30

Paul David Hewson, better known as Bono, the lead singer and lyricist of U2, has an interesting thing to say and i quote

"Look, the secular response to the Christ story always goes like this: He was a great prophet, obviously a very interesting guy, had a lot to say along the lines of other great prophets, be they Elijah, Muhammad, Buddha, or Confucius. But actually Christ doesn't allow you that. He doesn't let you off that hook. Christ says, No. I'm not saying I'm a teacher, don't call me teacher. I'm not saying I'm a prophet. I'm saying: 'I'm the Messiah.' I'm saying: 'I am God incarnate.' . . . So what you're left with is either Christ was who He said He was—the Messiah—or a complete nutcase. . . . The idea that the entire course of civilization for over half of the globe could have its fate changed and turned upside-down by a nutcase, for me that's farfetched." Full Article here

In a couple of forthcoming posts i will

1) Explain the logic and reasoning behind Jesus Christ. Who He was? why did He die? whats the logic behind it all? was He a lunatic?

2) Attempt to analyse the God Debate between Sam Harris and Rick Warren. Go through it, and draw your own conclusions.

Get connected .. what are you waiting for?

2007-04-20T13:14:00.000+05:30

orkut?
facebook?
myspace?
friendster?
bebo?
fropper?
minglebox?
bolt?
yaari?
yo4ya?
jhoom?
apnaydesi?
humsubka?
saffronconnect?
zorpia?
gazzag?
hi5?
myYearbook?
meetup?
meetin?
tribe?
gainpals?

Given the rate of copulation and the subsequent increasing population, i think we could do with 835, 971 more social networking sites. Then, we can have so many friends and friendships and so many more fraands and more fraandships!! Wherever you go you have a friend.

Go to Ibiza and you have a beach babe of a friend there.
Go to Alaska and you have an Eskimo friend there.
Go to Ceres and Eris and you have friends there.
Go to the toilet and you have a friend there.

What a wonderful life!

Is this the way?

2007-04-16T08:57:00.000+05:30

Rajan Bala for the Indian cricket coach

2007-04-07T12:41:00.000+05:30

Say NDTV conjures up a 'special' programme on domestic violence. Not BDSM. Cruelty to kids and wives and husbands. With the focus on the movie 'Provoked', the story of Kiranjit Ahluwalia is explained, and facts and figures furnished about the rising instances of wife-beating cases among Indian families both in India and abroad. After all the startling, blood-chilling facts are presented, they conduct an interview and ask the interviewee more about the incidence of domestic violence. Whom do they interview - Not the Southall Black Sisters or some PETS (People for the Ethical Treatment of Spouses) - They interview the intellectual and strong social thinker that is Aishwarya Rai.

Along similiar lines but a change of subject. Lets talk about our battered cricket team. Serious issue, and a posse of intellectuals with just the right mixture of cricketing experince and no cricketing experience. Some depressants are less agonizing than others. NDTV had their INDIAN CRICKET OPINION POLL or some similar name of that sort on Good Friday. I have been watching NDTV for a while and if you are a NDTV novice, you must understand that they take their opinion polls real seriously. Their recent opinion poll on the UP Assembly Elections and the subsequent predictions of a hung assembly, combined with the constant prodding by head honcho Prannoy Roy about the sample size employed and the accuracy of the poll left both Mayawati and Mulayam no maya to cling to and nothing mulayam to lean on.

Coming back to the topic of the GREAT INDIAN CRICKET OPINION POLL (or was it GREATEST?), the panelists were NKP Salve, Kishore Bhimani, Rajan Bala, Navjot Singh Sidhu and Ajay Jadeja. Whether the one hour long discussion threw something new in the fray, discovered some hidden secrets, or zeroed down on the cause of the Indian team's fall at the World Cup depends on each person's perspective. If you are like my 51 year old aunt who has never watched a single cricket game in her life, i'm sure you will find the discussion very enlightening.

But the point is not about NDTV. Its about a rising star on the horizon of Indian cricket. It about a man who needs no introduction. Because a mere introduction alone would not suffice. A man who has set precedents with his demeanour and class. A man who should be the Indian cricket team coach but is not yet because as you all know, the forces of darkness are prevailing at the moment. The great Rajan Bala.

I strongly recommend Rajan Bala for the post of the coach of the Indian cricket team. Not without reason. But these are not the only reasons. There are countless unspeakable, inexpressible reasons that just are there deep in the trenches of every cricket lover's heart.

- He looks focussed. Our cricketers focus hard only at the crease, but Bala's gaze appears focussed all the time, as though he is expecting a Lasith Malinga bouncer from behind the curtain every minute of his life.

- His cricketing knowledge is better than anyone else living on planet earth in this century. Ask him any question, and he will reply with a good old Aussie anecdote.

- He heard it all when Vic Richardson took on Don Bradman, Trevor Hohns told Steve Waugh its time to pack up, Wally Hammond and Neville Cardus discussed eggs, and other instances like these. He may deny it, but i strongly feel his presence was the major motivating factor and source of strength and courage for conversation between them all.

- Greg Chappell text messages him at times. Batting tips will come from Greg, Under-arm bowling tips from Trevor, retirement tips from Ian, Baseball tips from Greg's son Jon(of the Toronto Blue Jays). So an all-round coach.

- His name is dangerous enough to scare the Indian players off any match-fixing aspirations.

- His bald dome poses less resistance to the absorption of new ideas and enhances the concept of an open mind.

- His pointed lips resemble those of Greg Chappell. Memories of sharp words for the Indian cricketers. The lips are the source of the tips and flips.

- His stare is very very unsettling, strong enough to unsettle any rival fielders fielding near the pavilion.

Some will argue that Bala has no cricketing experience. But he makes up for it with his sharp ears, his pointed lips, his bald dome, his clear voice, his steady gaze, his unsettling stare and his very underworld-don type name.

Its time to get behind him as one nation. As one body of one billion. Painted blue. With Pepsi bottles in our hands. Its time to say "BERMUDA ke saath khelega toh jeetega"!!!!

Bye Bye Chappell - We dont want you back

2007-04-05T06:20:00.000+05:30

=============================

Saurav Ganguly - I get knocked down, but i get up again, they are never gonna keep me down. Wah - wah

Greg Chappell - I get knocked down, so i make a mess, and get the next flight out of town. Wah - Wah

=============================

Tourists in Goa... Part Two

2007-04-04T16:52:00.000+05:30

This one was long overdue. After the Indian Tourists who visit Goa, its time to make a few categories of the firangi aka foreign variety.

1) Rebels/Ravers
- They wear loose pyjamas and sport unkempt hair, and are usually spotted puffing ciggies away like there is no tomorrow. Sometimes they are so tall and lean, they remind you of the stilt walkers. Get along pretty well with almost everyone in town and have a nagging tendency of inviting the wrath of stray dogs. They hang out by the beach and are always game for a joint and some cheap booze. There is very little that turns them on more than a rave gig with deafening goa trance. The girls mostly are German or Scandinavian while a surprising majority of the guys are Israelis. Most travel by local transport, and usually have a Lonely Planet Guide in one hand and a cig in the other. Their hairstyles can put all from Sanjay Malakar to Djibril Cisse to shame and their clothes will make all at Lakme Fashion Week proud.

2) Retired old couples
- Fat, rotund and pinkish in colour, and all of them almost without exception, have silver or golden hair. Blessed with the balance but not the vital stats of a figure skater, their burly frame is well supported by two legs although laws of mechanics might recommend three. They are mostly spotted walking around Panjim, carrying plastic bags full of miniature Taj Mahals and the like. Dont be surprised if they ask you for directions to the Panjim Church or the Head Post Office, while standing outside the very same place. Respond respectfully, not with laughter or malaise, but with words that will make them happy and assure them that getting around in Panjim is indeed hard. Being slow movers, their bulk and speed on the narrow footpaths remind you of old trucks on one-way lanes.

3) The rich bums
- The celeb, rich brats, spoilt kids of the rich and famous, who look just like any other tourists in Goa, can be spotted too. According to them, the sea is safe for swimming even when you are high on booze(the alcohol makes sure you float, not drown) and the roads safe for speeding two wheelers even though they have never rode on one ever. These specimen live in their hotel rooms, and sunbathe on the private beaches of the 5 star resorts. They usually see the sights as they pass by in their air-conditioned cars. There is a better chance you will recognise them on TV rather than in person. Celeb singers write songs in their hotel rooms, some shoot a video and the movie stars attend parties within the resorts, but in all this the fact remains - No one knows who they are. These specimen think they walk one foot above the ground, little realising they are thousands of miles below the sky.

Cricket World Cup 2007 - Oooh aaah ouuch

2007-03-31T00:00:00.001+05:30

India's exit at the World Cup has given me 4 reasons to smile. To look back and say, it feels so good its over. 4 No-mores i am thankful for:

1) No More Illusions -
That we are the world's best team or can be one. We have a great Test team. Why? Because Test cricket is not about running hard between the wickets and diving in the field. Test cricket does not make every dot ball count as much as One-Day cricket does. In Test cricket, technique is still king. We need batsmen and we need bowlers. We dont need athletes. One-day cricket on the other hand is becoming more exciting and appealing than ever. The future belongs to the team that has players who can do three things really well ( besides batting and bowling, which are the obvious pre-requisites) One, dive on the field and stop the extra run, two, convert the twos into threes through excellent running between the wickets and three, hit a ball into the stands at will. This means, future one-day cricketers must be quick, athletic and strong. If India has to be a powerhouse in one-day cricket, this is the direction to mould the players into.

2) No more stupid fake advertisements -
Sunfeast's 'har ghar mein Sachin', Samsung's 'hamare team ka kaptaan banoge?', Pepsi's 'ooh aah India Aaya India' and needless more.. Finally they have realised the Indian cricket team is human. The dumbest thing though, is how infinitely stupid our cricketers are. If a cricketer gets paid to say "I am the god who never fails because i drink susu-cola" he will say it little realising that susu-cola is drawing the profits and he is raising the expectations of a population that seeks relief and an escape from the reality show called survival in cricket victories, cinematic illusions and copulation. Raising 1 billion hopes with some stupid 'Ladega toh Jeetega' wont help at all. 1 billion hopes can go to the dogs, but please don't let down the sponsors! Just try to hang in there. Money talks and rocks and walks. And also socks. India is 136/6. Sehwag, Sachin, Dhoni all back in the pavilion, and you have a Ooh-Aaa-India ad... WOW!! Timing is everything....

3) No more Greg Chappell (Hopefully) -
Never liked this guy. Not a single batsman specific strategy against Sri Lanka. No gameplan. Nothing. Just excuses. He started off with the whole big bad experimentation histrionics. Nothing came off. The whole gaffe flopped so badly, that the selectors had to send a team to the World Cup based on popular choice and least risk options. In Indian Summers, John Wright mentions the words of a South African who said something like "In India, if you win they will name a street after you but you lose and the same guys will chase you down the same street". Greg Chappell cant get away with a under-arm delivery this time. Face the music.

4) No more Mandira Bedi -
Is she in a cricket analysis show for what? her beauty? her fashion bloopers? her cricketing knowledge? her patriotic enthusiasm? Mandira Bedi could have been excused the last time at the 2003 World Cup, not now though, because you expect 4 years to be a long enough time to pick up on a little bit of cricketing jargon and atleast have the tendency to ask decent questions to the former cricketers. Mandira Bedi is a very good actress. I am not so sure about cricket though, just wonder if the money is really so much good, that she is so willing to make a complete fool of herself in a show about a sport she understands a fair bit but knows nothing of beyond the surface to be anchoring a cricket analysis programme. I had decided to sit through an entire session of Extraaaaa Innninnngggsss and note down all the questions and comments coming from Mandira before the match, during the break and after the match and post them here. But then figured its just not worth the effort. But i leave you with a gem that can only come from Mandira - After the first innings of the India v/s Bermuda match, India posted a total 413 for 5. Mandira came up with a question for Dean Jones "Was there any excuse for Ganguly for playing out a maiden over?" Is there no other good-looking and popular actress who follows cricket with genuine passion?

====================

There is hope for India though. Get Manoj Tiwary, Rohit Sharma, Piyush Chawla, Cheteshwar Pujara, Gaurav Dhiman and Suresh Raina please! Its a great time to throw the youngster into the ring. Adversity is a good mother, because the real champions are born out of her womb..

Air Deccan rocks and shocks!

2007-03-30T12:02:00.000+05:30

Keegan sent in an email forwarded to him - This is hilarious. Appears to be fictitious but a great read anyway. Air Deccan has been the subject of many a rant. (1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8)

======================================

Good morning, Ladies and Gentlemen. This is your captain PATEL welcoming
both seated and standing passengers on board of Air Deccan.
We apologize for the four-day delay in taking off, it was due to bad
weather and partly due to the search for a missing tyre.

This is flight 717 to Mumbai. Landing there is not guaranteed, but we
will End up somewhere in India. And, if luck is in our favor, we may
even be landing on your village!

Air Deccan has an excellent safety-record. In fact, our safety standards
are so high, that even terrorists are afraid to fly with us! It is with
pleasure; I announce that, starting this year, over 30% of our
Passengers have reached their destination.

If our engines are too noisy for you, on passenger request, we can
arrange to turn them off. To make your free fall to earth pleasant and
memorable, we serve Complimentary DHARU and Wada pavw. For our
not-so-religious passengers, we are the only airline who can help you
find out if there really is a God!

We regret to inform you, that today's in-flight movie will not be shown
as we forgot to record it from the television. However, for our movie
buffs, we will be flying right next to Kingfisher Airline, where their
movie will be visible from the right side of the cabin window.

There is no smoking allowed in this airplane. Any smoke you see in the
Cabin is only the early warning system on the engines telling us to slow
down!

In order to catch important landmarks, we try to fly as close as
possible. For the best view , if however, we go a little too close, do
let us know. Our enthusiastic co-pilot sometimes flies right through the
landmark!

Kindly be seated, keep your seat in an upright position for take-off and
fasten your seat-belt. For those of you who can't find a seat-belt,
kindly Fasten your own belt to the arm of your seat. And, for those of
you who can't find a seat, do not hesitate to get in touch with a
stewardess who will explain how to fasten yourself to your suitcase.

Dear God

2007-03-27T22:26:00.000+05:30

A Nun asked her class to write notes to God.
Here are some they handed in:

**********

#I didn’t think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset You made on Tuesday. That was cool.

#Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones, why don’t You keep the ones You already have?

#Maybe Cain and Abel would not have killed each other if they had their own rooms. That’s what my Mom did for me and my brother.

#If You watch me in church on Sunday, I’ll show You my new shoes.

#I bet it is very hard to love everyone in the whole world. There are only 4 people in our family and I’m having a hard time loving all of them.

#In school they told us what You do. Who does it when You are on vacation?

#Are You really invisible or is it just a trick?

#Did You mean for the giraffe to look like that or was it an accident?

#Who draws the lines around the countries?

#I went to this wedding and they kissed right in the church. Is that OK?

#Did You really mean “do unto others as they do unto you”? Because if You did, then I’m going to get my brother good.

#Thank You for the baby brother, but I think you got confused because what I prayed for was a puppy.

#You don’t have to worry about me; I always look both ways.

#I think about You sometimes, even when I’m not praying.

#My brother told me about being born but it doesn’t sound right. They’re just kidding, aren’t they?

#I would like to live 900 years just like the guy in the Bible.

#We read Thomas Edison made light. But in Sunday school they said You did it. So, I bet he stole Your idea.

(LINK)

A 13 year old dream ..

2007-03-25T18:10:00.000+05:30

Almost 13 years ago, Brian Lara received a clamorous welcome when he returned to Trinidad after making a then-record Test score of 375 against England in Antigua. He was showered with gifts and walked a crimson carpet as crowds flocked to the airport to glimpse West Indies' new cricketing messiah. Fans held children aloft to see the man with the golden bat who embodied the Caribbean islands' hopes of a new era of domination. One of those kids was a 10-year-old boy from the valley town of Santa Cruz who recounts 'I was at the airport when Lara came back home. Someone lifted me up to see as I was too small. People were saying to me, "In 10 years' time we hope it is you that we are coming to see." A couple of weeks later I actually met him in person, in our village [Cantaro] in Santa Cruz. Talk was going around that I was going to be "the next Lara", so he asked me about that and I just smiled. I was just happy to be around him. Knowing that he was the best player in the world and that I could actually be so close and talk to him was something I admired.'

More here

Bob Woolmer murder suspect

2007-03-23T08:55:00.000+05:30

Bob Woolmer has been murdered. He was the coach of the Pakistan team who died of asphyxiation caused by manual strangulation less than 24 hours after Pakistan lost to Ireland in a first round match on Saturday. He was found unconscious at 10.45 am local time in his hotel room in Kingston, Jamaica by a chambermaid. His last known form of communication was an email he sent out to his wife at 3.12 am local time.

Never before has a murder scandal of this proportion hit world cricket.

Sickeningly, the amount of speculation and rumours surrounding the murder are rife. Who might be responsible? Why was he murdered? Hindi news channels in India have an amazing tendency to jump the gun to grab eyeballs (read TRPs). If they receive an anonymous call from a prankster who divulges false information and implicates a famous person in the murder, will they run it as "BREAKING NEWS" first and then bother about figuring out who was on the line? I wonder...

The Effort Effect - Carol Dweck

2007-03-15T13:30:00.000+05:30

Sometimes talent fades away. Sometimes, it persists and shines. Many are the ruminations and excogitations on the subject.

Failure could mean two things - for some it is a road-block, while others perceive it as a stepping stone to success. Who thinks what? and why do they percieve it that way?

Guy Kawasaki points to a interesting study by a Psychology Professor at Stanford University, Carol Dweck who believes she has some answers. (See illustration)

Foreign-born players at the ICC World Cup

2007-03-14T15:45:00.000+05:30

Anthropology experts after having carefully examined and analysed hundreds of doctoral dissertations have concluded that there are two types of people in this world. One, who love cricketing trivia, and the other, who don't.

If you are a cricketing trivia buff, you will relish this with glee. However, if you belong to the second category of people, please do me a favour before you proceed further : Please keep all hard and easy to fling objects away from you, I repeat, please keep all hard and easy to fling objects away from you, as you might just be tempted to throw the flower pot or something of the sort on my nose (with glee?) for making your day a little more miserable!

Here we go...

The ICC Cricket World Cup 2007 is underway. Among the 16 teams in the tournament, there are 5 who have qualified by virtue of their performance in the qualification tournament, the ICC Trophy.

Interestingly, a majority of the cricketers in associate and affiliate countries, the ones that need to qualify, are expatriates from or born in Test playing countries.

Here is a list of all the countries at this year's tournament with the players in their ranks who were born in a country, other than the one they are representing at the moment.

Canada has 12 players -> Geoff Barnett in New Zealand, Umar Bhatti & Qaiser Ali in Pakistan, Anderson Cummins & George Codrington in Barbados, Ashish Bagai & Ashif Mulla in India, Sunil Dhaniram & Abdool Samad in Guyana Desmond Chumney in St Kitts, Austin Codrington in Jamaica, and Henry Osinde in Uganda.

The Netherlands has 8 players -> Billy Stelling, Ryan ten Doeschate & Eric Szwarczynski in South Africa, Adeel Raja & Mohammad Kashif in Pakistan, Peter Borren & Darron Reekers in New Zealand and Alexei Kervezee in Namibia.

Scotland has 5 players -> Ryan Watson in Zimbabwe, Paul Hoffmann & Glenn Rogers in Australia, Fraser Watts in England and Dewald Nel in South Africa.

Ireland has 4 players -> Trent Johnston, Dave Langford-Smith & Jeremy Bray in Australia, and Andre Botha in South Africa.

England has 4 players -> Kevin Pieterson and Andrew Strauss in South Africa, Jamie Dalrymple in Kenya, and Ed Joyce in Ireland

Kenya has 2 players -> Rajesh Bhudia and Tanmay Mishra in India

New Zealand has 1 player -> Scott Styris in Australia

Australia has 1 player -> Andrew Symonds in England

Bermuda has 1 player -> Saleem Mukuddem in South Africa

India, Pakistan, West Indies, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, South Africa, and Zimbabwe have no foreign born players within their ranks.

Information all taken from good old Cricinfo Incase you are wondering who the hell is Cricinfo, he is another cricket buff, but much worse than me!

Now was that not enlightening information!

Its time to rush and vanish at a speed faster than the time it takes for you to get to that flower pot!

The Gavaskar Ponting spat

2007-03-13T13:05:00.000+05:30

Sunil Gavaskar made the following comment -

Australia's come-uppance at the hands of England and New Zealand has gladdened the hearts of not just the other aspirants for the World Cup but also the followers of the game. There is not the slightest doubt that in the last decade or so the Aussies have been awesome in batting, bowling and fielding which has taken them to the top of the cricketing ladder in both Test and limited overs cricket. But they have also been awful in the way they have sometimes behaved on the field much to the chagrin of the traditional fans of the game. Unlike the West Indian teams of the 1970s and 1980s which dominated world cricket in much the same way as the Australians are doing now, the Australians are not popular winners. The Windies were feared for the ferocity of their attack and the aggression of their batsmen but at the end of the playing day the West Indian player was not only admired but also liked. They went about their job in a no fuss manner and hardly had anything to say to the opponents, unlike the Aussies who have plenty to say and seldom in a humorous way. Banter works, abuse doesn't. (Link)

Ricky Ponting's response

"We all know the way he played his cricket, don't we? If he is talking about us, what about the way India have played their cricket over the last few years? I know who I would rather be going to watch. Have a look at how many Test matches they have won. He [Gavaskar] has been a big part of that, he has been a selector and he has been on the coaching committee. They might want to start to look at the way they play their own cricket rather than looking at us. For him to go on about behaviour, not too many captains have dragged their teams off the field, either. I don't mind if 'Mr Perfect' comes out and goes on about our team, I know we are all not perfect. We are not going to keep everyone happy 100% of the time. But for some of these guys that have done it all themselves, it's pretty high and mighty for them to say that."

Ponting admitted he had been reported "more than anybody" since becoming captain - he was found guilty of dissent twice in 2006 - but returned to Gavaskar and recalled his attempted walk-off at the MCG in 1980-81. (Link)

Ponting has two arguments here.
1) He believes Gavaskar, who has been on the coaching committee and a selector, has had a major role to play in India's dismal performance in the last 12 tests, of which India won only 3.
2) Gavaskar threatened to walk off the field in a test match once. So he is no Mr Perfect and should not be lecturing others on behaviour.

Gavaskar has given a reply. But before we go into that, here are a few FACTS to ponder over.

Can a selector or a person on the coaching committee make the team win? I think Ponting should ask Greg Chappell if he has been the reason for India's dismal performance. The only thing i fear, if India does well at the ongoing World Cup, is this Chappell dude, a renowned specialist in crappy tactics to win games(video), taking the credit. He has had no notable coaching achievements, and the guys at BCCI were perhaps impressed by the smooth talk and authoritative tone of voice, and with his playing achievements to boot, they figured he was the best guy for the job of Indian coach. Paul Wilson, a South Australian test cricketer, believes "he was a poor coach when it came to looking after a group of people."

Gavaskar has had good things to say about Ponting before. In his comments, he was not targeting Ponting, but the entire Australian team as a whole. Ponting could not resist taking a personal cheapshot. Ponting is No Mr. Perfect. When was Gavaskar fined for dissent? I checked here and here and here and here and here but the star of the show is Ricky Ponting in each case. How many cricketers have had alcohol problems and pub-fights and illegal bat issues with the ICC, besides being fined for dissent?

India have been at the receiving end for far too long. The Australians say they will get over it. Will they? Ever?

Now getting back to Gavaskar. His retort

Some day, some other hot-head guy might actually get down and you know whack somebody who abuses him. There's the example of the late David Hookes. Would the Australians who use that kind of language on the field, and not all of them do, in a bar and would they get away with it? Would they have a fist coming at their face or not? The reason the walk off took place was simply because I was abused by the Australians. Let me also come back to what he [Ponting] said about the way I played my cricket and I do not know what he's looking at. When he talks about the Indian team not having won matches, we are not talking about winning matches here, we are talking about behavior on the field. The West Indians were popular winners, there was an affection about the West Indians players in spite of the fact that they were beating you in three days, they [West Indies] did not abuse the opponents. They did not have anything to say to the opponents. When they were dominating world cricket the West Indians did not resort to personal abuse on the field, they just played the game hard, they were very tough competitors but there was nothing untoward in their behaviour towards their opponents. West Indian players always had a smile on their face when they came in at the end of day's play to talk with you and to commiserate when you lost, you could see that there was no arrogance there. Cricket lovers all over the world wanted the West Indies teams to get back on their feet and start winning again. (Link)

Here is what Cricinfo has to say about the Gavaskar walk-off which Ponting pointed out so well..

In February 1981, Australia met India at Melbourne in the final game of a three-match series which Australia led 1-0. Gavaskar, India's captain, had struggled from the off, dismissed for a duck by Lillee in the opening Test at Sydney and following that with scores of 10, 23 and 5. At the MCG that poor run continued - he made 10 as India conceded a first-innings deficit of 182.
The series had been dogged by some inconsistent umpiring which the Indians felt had largely gone against them. The inexperienced Rex Whitehead, who made his debut in the first Test and stood in all three matches, was singled out for blame. In the aftermath of the Lillee-Gavaskar incident, Shahid Durrani, India's manager, cited seven decisions made by Whitehead which had gone against India and, he said, caused them to become angry.
Second time around at the MCG, India put up a much better fist of things. Opening with Chetan Chauhan, Gavaskar had finally begun to find his form and was enjoying a feeling of "confidence and optimism" as they put on 165 for the first wicket.
But then came the fireworks. Lillee jagged one back into Gavaskar, who was on 70, and appealed for leg-before. That the ball was hitting was not in doubt, but Gavaskar was adamant that he had edged it. Whitehead disagreed, and gave him out. "We were sure," Lillee recalled. "The only one who had a problem with it was Sunny who, until that day, had never scored runs against me."
Gavaskar stood his ground long enough for his anger to be apparent, slapping his bat into his pad for good measure. "He spat the dummy right out of the pram," Lillee explained. He further antagonised the fuming Gavaskar by advancing down the pitch, pointing at the pad and offering a few choice words of advice.
As Gavaskar reluctantly started to leave, Lillee made one comment too many and Gavaskar snapped, returning to the crease and instructing Chauhan to walk off the pitch with him. A bemused Chauhan did as he was told, but at the boundary edge the batsmen were met by Durrani and Bapu Nadkarni, the assistant manager. Chauhan was persuaded to return to resume his innings, while Gavaskar was ushered into the pavilion. But Chauhan's concentration was wrecked, and he added only a few more runs before holing out to Bruce Yardley in the covers for 85, to give Lillee his second wicket of the innings.
Durrani's quick intervention saved the incident from becoming far more serious. Had Gavaskar succeeded in his walkoff then it was not inconceivable that India could have forfeited the Test.
"I was infuriated by the injustice of it all," Gavaskar told reporters. "Whitehead has stood in all three Tests, and many bad decisions by him have gone against us."
Lillee was in no doubt what was behind Gavaskar's histrionics. "I know from what his team-mates told me that he was desperate to score a hundred against me. It was frustration at getting so close to his goal which made him blow up."(Link)

We have verbal abuse, also termed as sledging. We have woofing. Maybe the Aussies can introduce a form of kick-boxing on the cricket field, and give it a fancy name, and say its just part of being aggressive. The Aussies have been known to mentally disintegrate opponents on the field and off the field with mind games. Sometimes even resorting to racial abuse. So when a blow comes your way, and you cant duck out, you must be brave enough to take it.

Just to put things in perspective, Gavaskar is no Ganguly. When Ganguly gives back, its payback time in full measure. Gavaskar's views on sledging can be known for a speech of his here. But Ganguly belongs to a more aggressive, in-your-face school of thought. Gavaskar is the gentlemanly character, the one who is seen, as the more sedate and patient guy in the pack. His comments are balanced comments where he affirms that in the last decade or so the Aussies have been awesome in batting, bowling and fielding which has taken them to the top of the cricketing ladder in both Test and limited overs cricket. There can be no two ways about it. Just like there are no two ways about the Aussie behaviour on and off the field.

Did i do something wrong?

2007-03-09T11:30:00.000+05:30

Transcript of a online chat conversation with Jayesh

--------------------------------------------------------------

Jayesh (3/9/2007 11:26:15 AM): jackson bab

Me (3/9/2007 11:26:22 AM): Hi Jayesh
Me (3/9/2007 11:26:24 AM): How are you
Me(3/9/2007 11:26:27 AM): How is work
Me(3/9/2007 11:26:30 AM): How is your job
Me (3/9/2007 11:26:40 AM): How is your life
Me (3/9/2007 11:26:44 AM): How is Pune
Me (3/9/2007 11:26:50 AM): How is everyne at home
Me (3/9/2007 11:27:17 AM): How are things
Me (3/9/2007 11:27:24 AM): How are your colleagues at work

Jayesh has signed out. (3/9/2007 11:27 AM)

-------------------------------------------------------------

P.S. I am normally not so curious

A cry in the wilderness?

2007-03-06T12:15:00.000+05:30

The 'Association of the Unknowns' has organised a massive Protest Rally at the Very Big Stadium to protest against the discrimination of ordinary and unknown people from all over in everyday life.

With bright large banners full of vivid messages like "Know us now" and "Glory to someone" and "Attention is our warcry", members from the group announced their intentions at a road blockade outside the office of the city's top newspaper "Whines of the World". The road blockade was the last resort because their last 3 press conferences were attended by 1 journalist, and their story never made its way to the local press.

The group expressed dismay at the shabby treatment meted out to normal people by society as compared to famous people, and oppugned the basis for it. The group said that while issues and champions of sexual discrimination, racial discrimination, religious discrimination, regional discrimination have been highlighted, no one has raised their little finger by a millimetre towards the menace of ordinariness based discrimination.

It appears that the organisation is planning many activities to draw attention to their problems. Some of the issues they want to address at the rally relate to everyday life a few of which include (quoted from 'A proclamation of revolt')

The actions of famous people become a fashion statement. Consider burping. The style in which a famous person burps is imitated by people. Parents encourage their kids to burp in a similiar manner. Unknown people are frowned upon if they burp in a style that does not conform to any famous style. This hinders them from exhibiting their flair.

At traffic signals, beggars throw money on the celebrities as a show of their appreciation and love. Unknown people, on the other hand, are harassed by the same beggars and let go only if they part with some cash. The discrimination at traffic signals is the most appalling.

Celebs are paid to attend public functions, inauguration of business establishments, school day functions and given free snacks. Unknown people on the contrary, have to be given invites or have to pay to attend. Snacks also have to be paid for (sometimes).

When a famous person goes shirtless (or topless or even nude), its termed as either artistic or bold or sensual. When unknown people do the same, its termed as insane and vulgar.

While famous people can fart audibly in public, unknown souls have to be more cautious with the decibel level. Deplorably, double standards are employed here, causing the majority of the unknown people to suppress and let go quietly and hence powerfully for the odour to be strong enough to be used as a tranquiliser for wild elephants.

Famous people are mobbed for autographs and photographs wherever they go. Unknown people, have to pay photographers to click a routine picture at the Gateway of India. Autographs are sought only in banks.

A brochure aptly titled 'A proclamation of revolt' published for the rally, was released just on the road to commemorate the occasion. The brochure contains the philosophy, the mission statement and information about the various activities. Copies of the brochure are being forcefully distributed on the streets. As for future plans after the rally, the protestors said that they intend to march to the adjoining bhelpuri stalls at the rally grounds and help themselves.

In the ensuing conversation, the Chairman of the Association of the Unknowns asked, ' famous people are demi-gods, but cant non-famous people like me be treated atleast like semi-gods?'.

When it was pointed out that there is no term like semi-gods, he broke down. With tears in his eyes and a choked voice, he went on 'Can't you just accept that semi-god is a term, instead of casting doubts over me and my grasp of English and in the process looking down on me just because i'm not famous'.

Wiping away the tears, and gathering his wits, with a determined look in his eyes he asserted, 'i will do something about this. I will change things. I am sick and tired of being the victim all the time. Its time for change. Yes, I will become famous'.

When asked as to how he plans to become famous, he revealed plans to organise more protest rallies and all night vigils to raise awareness about the issue. Now guys, be good and spread the message! Else he will start crying again and it will be all your fault! Yes, you, the reader!

Overheard!

2007-03-05T08:47:00.000+05:30

The following are actual conversations overheard !! Not a bunch of of made-up jokes...

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Blonde: ... So as soon as we got home from spring break I told my boyfriend that I had sex with Brad on the beach.
Friend: Oh my gosh! What did your boyfriend do?!
Blonde: He said, 'I guess we're not riding in Brad's limo for prom.'
Friend: What's wrong with Brad's limo?!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Bimbette looking up at cliff face: Hey, do rocks eat other rocks?
Guy: ... Huh?
Bimbette: Do rocks eat other rocks? You know, so that they can grow into bigger rocks...
Guy: Are you serious? No, rocks do not eat other rocks.
Bimbette: Then, like... How do they get bigger?
Guy: [Silence.]
Bimbette: Like, what do they eat?

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Chick: So, what's there to do for fun around here?
Lifeguard: I dont know, I'm Canadian.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Boy #1: Yeah, it was cool, but that bouncer searched me like crazy. He was patting my thighs and stuff. Security is crazy at that place, huh?
Boy #2: What security?
Boy #3: What bouncer?
Boy #1: You know, that big, fat guy near the entrance.
Boy #2: There was no security dude.
Boy #1: ... Then who the hell was that guy?!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Mother taking away son's boogie board: Enough, time to leave and go home.
Young son: You don't deserve a child!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Teen girl #1: Are you done yet?
Teen girl #2: Still haven't done it yet... By the way, you might not want to get in the way of the current!
Boy: Gross! She's peeing!
Teen girl #2: Shhh! Everyone can hear you!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Kid #1: Wanna make a sand castle?
Kid #2: I don't like you.
Kid #1: Wanna go swimming?
Kid #2: I don't like you.
Kid #1: Wanna go eat ice cream?
Kid #2: Wanna go die?

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Mom: Are you ready to go?
Little girl: No!
Mom: Okay, let's go!

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Chick #1: So, where are you going for your trip?
Chick #2: Thailand!
Chick #1: Cool! I worked with a guy from Korea once!
Chick #2: Ummm, yeah, that's not the same, really.
Chick #1: It's not? Oh... Things must be different now than from when he lived there.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Anorexic girl: I wish I had AIDS. I hear you lose a lot of weight that way.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Girl #1: Great, now we can't go swimming.
Girl #2: Why not?
Girl #1: 'Cause it's raining. That'd be, like, double wet.
Girl #2: Oh.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Perv #1: Dude, check out that girl!
Perv #2: Which one?
Perv #1: Over there, in the yellow suit!
Perv #2: What? She can't be more than twelve!
Perv #1: Dude, I would totally do her!
Perv #2: You need help, man. She doesn't even have tits.
Perv #1: I'm not a titty man.
Perv #2: Yeah, well, your boyfriend in prison will be glad to hear that.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Girl: It's so nice out today. I love natural wind.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Child: Mommy, how old are you?
Mother: I am forty.
Child: [counting on fingers] Jeez, Mommy, you're running out of numbers.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Teen girl: Do sea lions swim?
Mom: No, they ride boats.

----------------------------------------------------------------------
Check out more stuff
overheard at the beach
Also check out
overheard in New York
overheard in the office

Reality Check - 2

2007-03-03T10:57:00.000+05:30

If I visit the zoo and a little lamb came running towards me, I probably wouldn't be afraid at all because lambs are harmless. I might even reach out my hand and let the lamb lick it. But let's say I'm at the zoo and the alarm goes out that a lion has escaped from its cage. I'm standing there with my back to the wall and that lion comes running towards me, I'll sure be terrified because I know what lions can do. But just suppose that the runaway lion corners me and comes up to me - but instead of attacking me, it gently licks my hand the way the lamb did. If that happened whose gentleness would I appreciate more, the lamb's or the lion's?

Well, to put things in perspective, I am not that important if you judge me by my works and my talent and my abilities; and 100 or 200 or 500 years from now, no one will remember i even existed. Unless i am a Gandhi or a Hitler. Small and insignificant that i am, i am thankful i am spared, when i could have been destroyed. Grateful that i have been blessed, when my life was bad enough for me to be cursed.

What am i trying to get at here?

Well, for starters, its important to understand that we as humans are mighty insignificant, who lead delicate and fickle lives, as much as we might hate to admit it. The next earthquake, or the next tsunami or the next bout of road rage, or the next terrorist attack is all it can take to turn our lives, bundled with heaps of aspirations and dreams, into a cloud of smoke and a pile of nothingness.

To fully understand life and its significant trivialities, its important to look at the extremities that envelop our existence. Spend a day sitting on the benches outside the casualty ward of your local hospital and observe the patients as they are wheeled in from accidents and illnesses. Spend a day with a terminally ill patient who has realised that he only has a few months to live. Spend a day in your local slum, where the major worry every morning is whether the children will have food to eat for the day. Spend a day with the suffering and the sick and the hurt. Life is not about laughter and entertainment 24/7 even though the TV channels may want us to think so.

I am not an atheist, although i must admit i was one, at a point in my life when i was disillusioned with life. Brendan Manning puts it well when he says, 'The single greatest cause of atheism in the world today is Christians who acknowledge Jesus with their lips, then walk out the door and deny Him by their lifestyle. That is what an unbelieving world simply finds unbelievable.'

Waking up to reality was the toughest thing i have ever done, and the most significant thing i will ever do!

More to follow....

Earlier post - 1

Circumcision can prevent AIDS?

2007-02-24T09:56:00.000+05:30

A total of 2,784 HIV-negative, uncircumcised men aged 18-24 years for two years living in an area where an estimated 26 percent of uncircumcised men are infected with HIV by age 25 were studied over a period of two years. Out of the total, 1,393 volunteered to be circumcised. Over the two year period, their health was monitored and all received free HIV testing and counseling, medical care, tests and treatment for sexually transmitted infections, condoms and behavioral risk counseling during periodic assessments. 47 of the 1,391 uncircumcised men contracted HIV during the two-year study, compared with 22 of the 1,393 circumcised men.

Circumcised men may feel like they are protected from HIV and may be therefore more likely to engage in risky behavior.

As much as this is good information, the results can be misleading. No details are mentioned of how the 69 (47 + 22) men may have contracted HIV. There is no explicit mention, but i guess the assumption is made that all men had the same frequency of/exposure to sexual activity or infected needles or blood transfusions. I hope that is not the case because that is an incredibly stupid assumption. How can 2,784 men exhibit similiar behaviour in areas as vague as these? Some may have been sexually less promiscuous or less frequent in their exposure to needles or blood transfusions, unless their regular patterns of behaviour were controllably restricted or augmented to provide some uniformity to the sample under study.

We like to hear whatever is pleasing to the ears, and see only that which is a sight to behold. However, reality does not always conform to our standards of beauty and brilliance. Reality is what it is, and not what we would want it to be. Hence it is imperative that with issues of HIV and AIDS that are a serious concern for our generation and those that will follow, a lot of effort to ensure myths do not get propagated based on hearsay is taken.

Study Author Robert Bailey clarifies "Circumcision is by no means a natural condom"

Here is the link to the article about the study

Cricket Crazy!!

2007-02-23T08:30:00.000+05:30

Amit Varma has a great piece on India's obsession with cricket

People who are cynical about long-distance relationships know nothing of cricket and Indians. Non-resident Indians around the world pine for cricket as if their lover is an ocean away, and go to insane lengths to stay in touch. Prem Panicker, a legend among NRIs for his cricket writing for Rediff, once told me about a bunch of US-based Indians who, visiting India, dropped in to his office to chat with his team. This was a decade ago, and Rediff had just finished doing ball-by-ball commentary of the 1996 World Cup, and were wondering if such effort was worth it. “We wrote more than 60,000 words over eight hours during a day’s play,” Panicker told me. “We were wondering if anyone actually read that much.”

These kids did. They described to him how six of them would gather at one of their places, and they would follow the game in batches of three. One batch would sleep while the other half would ‘watch’ the game via the ball-by-ball commentary, refreshing the screen ferociously. Then, at the innings break, they’d wake the other batch up, brief them on what had happened, and go off to sleep. The other three would then take over. Refresh. Refresh. Refresh. All night.

Panicker said that this story was an eye-opener for him, as he realised how much cricket meant to these kids. “All of us like the game,” he said to me, “but this was like an obsession.”

Read the full piece

Reality Check - 1

2007-02-22T09:37:00.000+05:30

In a spate of future posts, not necessarily serial or periodic, i will expound my faith. Its there deep down and just waiting to explode!

For now, let me state that i go by logic and reasoning more than anything else. Also, i havent had a miraculous conversion. Through these posts labelled 'Reality Check', I will to relate my search for the truth and how i have come to the understanding of it.

Do not adjust reality - Its true! (Like New Zealand beat Australia 3-0)

Religion is man-made, the truth is not!

Sunil Gavaskar describing nose-picking

2007-02-18T20:16:00.000+05:30

If we go by the way he describes the cover drive, here is how the metaphysician in Sunil Gavaskar would describe nose-picking ->

The head held high, the chin pointing up, and the finger slowly transferred on to the nostril with the eyes wandering surreptitiously around to check if anyone is watching. The finger goes in and lucidly and beautifully rotates within the nostril with the elbow pointing downwards to get the correct elevation as the ball is fluently flung away to the floorwith precision. You can see the look of delight on his face as he watches it fly to the floor. It is not just about the timing, its also about the placement and he got both right. He knew exactly what he wanted and he did it with elan. An artist at work.

No, i'm not one of those guys..

2007-02-17T08:53:00.000+05:30

I met this doctor from AIIMS who is in Goa for a Physicians Conference and we got chatting as the bus rattled along to Panaji.

Originally from Manipur, Doc and I had lots to chat about. We spoke about football and Goa and medicine and the power of the internet and the conflicts in North East India and then....

Doc - So what do you do?

Me - I write software

Doc - (giving me that omniscient look) So you are a software engineer?

Me - (hesitantly) uhmmmmmm.... yeah..

And then we were back to normal conversation till he had to get off at the Goa Medical College.

And then the thought process started. Why do i hate to admit i am a software engineer? Being categorised as a software engineer is only fair. By qualification, i am a computer engineer (i checked the degree certificate and thats what it says) and by occupation, i write software. By passion, i am a lot many things which should matter and which one day will. But for now, getting back to the point, I am not a typical software engineer! The kind you will bump into in Bangalore or Pune or wherever. I am not one of those guys. I hate the banality, sounds so cliche. Thankfully, I dont have to wear a tie or even formal clothes to work. I wear jeans. I dont oil my hair. I dont dream about debugging errors (its been a long time since i have had such a dream, or nightmare), and i dont discuss the nitty-gritties of coding with friends after work. Coding is fun, and very interesting. But, its not what i live for!

I am a sore thumb, I stick out. Maybe i should ask the doc if there is a cure. But then, he is a nephrologist.

Just not good enough reasons!

2007-02-17T08:32:00.000+05:30

When you want to convince me to do something(like play chess or follow a philosophy or whatever), dont use any of the following arguments.

You must do it because everyone else is doing it. I think 'If you wanna go nowhere follow the crowd'.
You must do it because its a tradition, and the older folks do it. You know, your parents and the grandparents and such like. As far as i know, our ancestors were also cannibals.
You must do it because X (who is successful and rich) does it or did it or recommends doing it. Super duper crap.

I dont buy them at all. Just not good enough reasons.

This could have been YOUR story!

2007-02-16T10:56:00.000+05:30

Quoting Kiruba

It's cruel how life can completely change. Here's the true life incident of my neighbour that took place on Saturday. Imagine this, there's this bright bubbly guy who just got into engineering college. His lower middle class parents have scraped the bottom of their life savings to fund his education. It looked like any other guy's story, the boy would pass out of college, get a job in a software company and support his parents and help close out all the loans. Unfortunately, life took a different path.

The boy and his friends were on their hostel terrace, three floors high. While playing around, one of his friends tripped over the side wall, and while trying to hold on to anything to keep him from falling, he unfortunatley grabbed his friend's shirt. So, both the boys crashed to the ground below. Luckily, both the guys survived but with terrible consquences. Half my neighbour's ribs are broken, heavy internal bleeding, hands and legs fractured and he's become limp waist down. I hear the other kid is serious too.

What really tugged my heart strings were his parent's reaction when the doctor said that the hospital expenses would amount to Rs.7 lakhs, twice what they had paid for his engineering. Without blinking an eyelid, they decided to sell of their modest house. For them, their only son is everything.

If you think thats a heart-wrenching story and want to know what happened later and would like to offer your support and prayers in some small and significant manner, Kiruba tells you how you can help. Also check a follow up post here.

You can keep track of the boy's progress here.

UPDATE - (17.00 Indian Time) -> Click here.

Valentine's Day song in India

2007-02-15T08:53:00.000+05:30

This song's lyrics have been slightly modified to make it the original soundtrack of the story of a lover in India who was caught making out on Valentine's Day by activists seeking to protect Indian culture from Western influences and whacked royally. It happens.

Here goes ... straight from the hospital bed in Notting Hospital from the Loverboy dedicated to all those who protect and preserve our culture ...

========================================

It's amazing
how you can strike fear in my heart
Without saying a word, you can light up the park

Try as I may I can never explain
What I fear when i see you coming

[CHORUS:]
The frown on your face lets me know
That you'll whack me
There's a truth in your eyes
Saying you'll never leave me
The grasp of your hand says
You'll thrash me wherever I fall
You whacked me bad when I did nothing at all

All day long I can hear people
Talk about love
But when you hold me near
I forget about the love
(love)

Try as i may
I can never define
What's been said
Between your eyes and mine

[Repeat chorus twice]
(You whacked me bad when I did nothing at all) - Repeat twice

The frown on your face
The anger in your eyes
The grasp of your hand
Let's me know
That you'll whack me

[Repeat chorus]
(You whacked me bad when I did nothing at all) - Repeat twice

The frown on your face
The anger in your eyes
The grasp of your hand
Let's me know
That you'll whack me

(You whacked me bad when I did nothing at all) - Repeat twice

========================================

Applause ..... More applause .....

Happy what day??

2007-02-14T06:35:00.000+05:30

Friends are important!!

2007-02-13T10:46:00.000+05:30

the moon or the pillar?

2007-02-10T05:51:00.000+05:30

This guy is learning it the hard way. After his post, he has come in for piles of cow-dung from all who have taken offense to his views.

I wonder why we take the 'psychotic ramblings of a mad man' so seriously?

And also, what damage can a blogger do to South Indians(or 'madrasis')? Will companies stop investing in South Indian cities? Will the movies down south stop flourishing? Will the curd rice taste any less good?

We cant afford to take personal opinions so seriously. Thats because the blog macrocosm will have many characters, good, bad and the downright ugly. We will have experts, rationalists, ignorants and all jumping onto the bandwagon and expressing themselves on the web in the future. We will have good bloggers, bad bloggers, outspoken bloggers, brash bloggers, trash bloggers and free-floating bloggers. Will we draw the knives each time an opinion is expressed? Remember they told us 'think before you speak'! That will be substituted by 'google before you blog'.

A good friend in Manipal University once casually mentioned that all Mallus are bad people and kick you in the gut once they have finished business with you. I did not argue, believing that maybe he had some genuine stab-in-the-back experience. Three of my best friends are Mallus and in no way have this guy's words affected my friendship with any of them! Why should it? Whats true for him may not be true for me! A neighbor of mine is a Mallu and a new friend and i don't see why i should not think of him as just another good guy.

The post is in bad taste, and that is a fact. Too sick, na? Well, you haven't read the comments. They are even worse. Just as much as Vulturo has a responsibility to not make a fool of himself, so do guys and gals who comment on his post. While there is room for debate, there is no room for abuse. An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind.

Vulturo is probably getting some extra doses of the freedom of speech tonic administered to him, in an attempt, and i am not sure of this, to get him to take off his post. Why should he?
After all, he has learnt that freedom of speech applies to the comments section as well.

I don't read much of Vulturo, but maybe i should subscribe to him. He's got some funny opinions. Like his latest post, justifying what he said earlier. Besides, i think we should all link to him. He is happy his ad-sense revenues are going up. He does count the blessings.

If everyone keeps their courtyards clean, the whole world will be clean!

This is getting long, and i don't like long posts (on my blog). I better end this, before my keyboard collapses in a state of exhaustion!

P.S. As regards the title, it has to do with dogs. While dogs bark at the moon, they treat the pillar differently. You got to be the moon to escape with just a barking, you cant be a tree, or a wall or a pillar and get just the barking!!

Me - Simplified!!!

2007-02-08T22:23:00.000+05:30

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

Transcript

2007-02-07T14:07:00.000+05:30

D : We have plans to play tonight!
M : Oh!
D : You wanna come?
M : No, i have to stay home!
D : Yeah, you will end up bored watching us play! You should learn some moves, man!
M : How do you know i will end up bored watching you both play?
D : You dont understand any chess, do you?
M : Oh Chess!! No i dont!! Play hard :)

Why do i blog?

2007-02-06T17:25:00.000+05:30

Good question.

A politically correct answer to the question will be 'to vent what's within me and express myself and yada-yada-yada-sada-batat-wada' in typical beauty-pageant-contestant's-future-plans style.

An honest answer would be 'i have no idea'.

Frankly, my blog is not me. Its just a part of me, and very importantly, a very small part of me.
This blog will never be able to capture me wholly no matter how hard i try to fit into its confines!

There are so many issues that are close to my heart that i do not blog about. Why? No clue! There is so much being said everywhere and i dont think i want to add to the confusion with my half a cent worth opinions. Maybe i am a lazy bum or maybe i am a boring nerd who has nothing new to say or whatever.

A lot of the recent posts here have been written motivated purely by the lack of posting i do and my determination to get over my inertia of regular posting. Like what i am writing now. Or this or this !

And it surprises me when someone like Bombay Addict thinks my blog is worth a read and the same gets picked up and i see me listed here!

I ought to take this more seriously! I will! Now let me figure out from when!

CONFESSION - I am addicted to blog reading though. I subscribe to 80 blogs and i can tell you the number is increasing. Having been fed portions of glam tales and success stories by mainstream commercial media, it surprises me that stories of failure and rejection and defeat are not told as much so reality tales like this , in the commercial media this time, are what i find a big turn-on. That explains my addiction to blogs. Deep down, i am a pragmatist and a realist. I read because honest opinions and experiences are fascinating.

The Wedding In March

2007-01-31T11:56:00.000+05:30

The wedding is due to take place in the exotic Carribean Islands over a period of 16 days in March. The bride has many suitors. But we have our personal favourite. Mr Indian Cricket Team.

Mr Indian Cricket Team is getting ready for the challenge of wooing the bride amidst so many others who will look to do the same this March.

All the relatives and neighbours, just about everyone wants to have a say on how Mr Indian Cricket Team must prepare.

There are two categories of people who have decided to appoint themselves as official advisors to Mr Indian Cricket Team. Those who know him and those who dont.

They believe that Mr Indian Cricket Team will falter miserably at his attempts to win the bride over, if he does not heed their advice. Suggestions, advice, criticism and opinions float everywhere.

Most people giving advice have never even come close to getting involved with a bride of this sort. However, boldened by pseudo-self confidence and concern for Mr Indian Cricket Team, they are not letting their inexperience with this sort of thing block the rivers of advice they have and are freely showering it! They are never ever confused and never ever in a predicament. Their confidence stems from the innumerable times they have analyzed past attempts to woo similiar brides by Mr. Indian Cricket Team.

Indian Cricket Team!! Wonder what he feels like!! He knows that if he wins the bride over, everyone in his hometown will rejoice, give him cash and gifts and advertising contracts and name streets after him. If he loses, they will throw stones at his house, draw their knives and chase him down the same streets!!

Mr Indian Cricket Team has been well fed and so well cared for. He has been fussed over, and countless hours have been spent in discussing what's best for him. A small fall here and a scratch there and all hearts are in the mouth.

So Mr. Indian Cricket Team , you hen pecked son of a million mothers, we wish you well!!

Here is a picture of the bride

FANTASY ERASER RULE -> Even though the amount of fussing over and debate is directly proportional to hype-without-substance factor and hence directly proportional to sales of products endorsed by Mr Indian Cricket Team, it has no relation to, direct or indirect, inverse or perverse, to the performance of Mr Indian Cricket Team at the wedding.

This rule is also called the 'Reality-bit-my-butt-off Rule'.

Happy :)

2007-01-27T20:47:00.000+05:30

Yeahhhhh.........

Anthony Yeh has won MTV Roadies 4.

Now, if only Carol Gracias can win Bigg Boss and Gonzales beats Federer tomorrow i will be triple happy :))

Also, if New Zealand or England beat Australia in atleast one match in the tri-series down under, just one match, pleeeeeeeeeese, i will be ecstatic :)