Thursday, May 31, 2007

The Guys Rules

Another Ctrl C-Ctrl V post all lifted from an email from Brian.

Finally, the guys' side of the story. We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. Our rules.

  • Men are NOT mind readers.
  • Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
  • Crying IS blackmail.
  • Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
  • Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
  • Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
  • A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
  • Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
  • If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
  • If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
  • You can either ask us to do something. Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
  • Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
  • Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions & neither do we.
  • ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
  • If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
  • If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.
  • When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.
  • Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as cricket, soccer, gadgets or software.
  • You have enough clothes.

2 comments:

illusionaire said...

Thats an amazing ctrl+V :-)

I love posts like these... dunno why... hehehe... :-)

t said...

hahahahaha this is hilarious. there was another one - if the toilet seat is up, just put it down. after all, don't we put it up after you have used it? brilliant.

 
Powered by Olark