"Hows U" scrap on Orkut kills one

"Hows U" -> It is the worst possible scrap you can get on Orkut. I get it too.

So you reply "i'm doing good".

And then to get back at the person who sent that 5 letter scrap that wasted your 300 seconds, you write on his/her scrapbook "Hows u doin?"

And then the resulting scrap is not an answer that ends the formalities normally reserved for formal parties/gatherings/weddings among 50+ year olds with big reputations and even bigger paunches. Its a question again.
"Hows things n all?"

It gets to you. Things are good. I am good too :) . Osama Bin Laden is good. So is George Bush. Our doodhwala is good. And so are all his cows. The Indian cricket team is good too. Seriously. To summarise briefly, things are good and all are good. So things and all are good. Hope you got it. So you reply, as lucidly as you possibly can, fearing any extra words may create more questions in his/her inquisitive mind (you wonder whether your not asking any questions would imply that you are impolite, but you expect the other person to get the cue that you are busy at the moment)
"Good."

The next thing that happens - Another scrap. No problem. Another scrap question. Big problem. What question
"Great. Hows work"

So u reply
"I died. Came back alive for a brief moment just to tell you that i am dead and i will no longer be answering any more questions. Sorry. No condolence scraps. I warn you. If there are any, i will haunt you all your life, and worse still i will delete your Orkut account. Bye."