To Victoria Beckham : Me mate Dave played one of your records backwards, and it sounded loads better
To Liz Hurley : Now Liz you is a bigtime porn star is you no?
To Madonna : Anyways, you is known as da Immaterial Girl. Is dat cos your talent is immaterial compared to your ability to get your kit off? But dat is a bit stupid, innit? Every time I sees you, you ain't even wearing any material
To Elton John : you looked a total dic in the seventies wiv da shades but everyone looked like dics in da seventies
Sunday, July 29, 2007
To Victoria Beckham : Me mate Dave played one of your records backwards, and it sounded loads better
Posted by Jason at 10:24 PM
Friday, July 27, 2007
I have a short interest span. It is so short; i end up losing interest in the subject of my post as i approach its end. So most posts on various subjects are left abandoned as saved drafts. Which is unforgivable. And I do not have the patience to go back to them. Nor the inclination. But there is a guilt feeling somewhere.
Posted by Jason at 11:11 AM
Monday, July 23, 2007
Friday, July 20, 2007
A group of children were playing near two railway tracks, one still in use while the other disused. Only one child played on the disused track, the rest on the operational track. The train is coming, and you are just beside the track interchange. You can make the train change its course to the disused track and save most of the kids. However, that would also mean the lone child playing by the disused track would be sacrificed. Or would you rather let the train go its way?
Let's take a pause to think what kind of decision we could make................
Most people might choose to divert the course of the train, and sacrifice only one child. You might think the same way, I guess. Exactly, I thought the same way initially because to save most of the children at the expense of only one child was rational decision most people would make, morally and emotionally. But, have you ever thought that the child choosing to play on the disused track had in fact made the right decision to play at a safe place?
Nevertheless, he had to be sacrificed because of his ignorant friends who chose to play where the danger was. This kind of dilemma happens around us everyday. In the office, community, in politics and especially in a democratic society, the minority is often sacrificed for the interest of the majority, no matter how foolish or ignorant the majority are, and how farsighted and knowledgeable the minority are. The child who chose not to play with the rest on the operational track was sidelined. And in the case he was sacrificed, no one would shed a tear for him.
The great critic Leo Velski Julian who told the story said he would not try to change the course of the train because he believed that the kids playing on the operational track should have known very well that track was still in use, and that they should have run away if they heard the train's sirens. If the train was diverted, that lone child would definitely die because he never thought the train could come over to that track! Moreover, that track was not in use probably because it was not safe. If the train was diverted to the track, we could put the lives of all passengers on board at stake! And in your attempt to save a few kids by sacrificing one child, you might end up sacrificing hundreds of people to save these few kids.
While we are all aware that life is full of tough decisions that need to be made, we may not realize that hasty decisions may not always be the right one.
"Remember that what's right isn't always popular... and what's popular isn't always right."
Everybody makes mistakes; that's why they put erasers on pencils.
Courtesy - An email from Miguel Braganza
Monday, July 16, 2007
I have crossed a major milestone in my life today at 5.40 pm. It took me 24 years to get here. But it still feels sweet.
I got a friend request from this person on Orkut. There was no scrap preceding the request. I know girls get a lot of those, but i have decided that each time i get a random friend request i will post it here on the blog.
Now that i have got it, what more could i possibly want more ... I might as well go atop a building and jump down. Life feels like it has come a full circle.
If you want to know how fulfilling your life can be, mail that person at firstname.lastname@example.org and request a friend request on Orkut. I promise you - nothing in this world will beat the orgasmic excitement you will receive when you get that friend request..
Posted by Jason at 5:31 PM
Monday, July 09, 2007
A brilliant and enlightening discussion on science, technology, homosexuality and the like moderated by a scholar and all in just 6 minutes...
Posted by Jason at 11:55 PM
Sunday, July 08, 2007
I am scared of surrendering to my passion. Thats because I love my passion more than myself.
Mental Intercourse is the biggest aphrodisiac.
I would rather meet Viren Rasquinha than Sania Mirza
The rain, the greenery, the sea, together with coffee, music and sport made an intoxicating combination.
Passion, not pedigree, will win in the end - Jon Bon Jovi
500 years done the line, no will remember that a Jason Monserrate ever existed so i better not work on creating a reputation and name for myself because in the long run its gonna be futile anyways!
If i can be there when you need me, thats more than enough.
The truth does not hurt all the time. Most times it is liberating.
A quote by John D MacDonald
Integrity is not a conditional word.
It doesn't blow in the wind or change with the weather.
It is your inner image of yourself,
and if you look in there and see a man who won't cheat,
then you know he never will.
I am happy. I always am. I will always be. There are more reasons to laugh than to cry.
I'd rather be there during the bad times than the good ones. I always side with the underdog. During the Wimbledon final yesterday, I had no favourites. However, at the end, I wished Bartoli had won. But only after I saw her tears after the match.
Beggars are human. Criminals are human. Everyone has a soft side that is unexplored.
Everything is interesting. Life is. People are. The world is.
Posted by Jason at 3:45 PM
Friday, July 06, 2007
This blog is primarily a place for mindfarts. Mindfarts are periodic emissions of stray thoughts (garnished with sarcasm or scorn or whatever topping you choose) caused by the accumulation of too much matter in the mindosphere.
You know the feeling you get when it dawns on you that the possession you have always coveted and just very recently bought is not better than what you own currently and is not worth the exorbitant price you paid for it....
Simply put, you know the feeling you get when you have been coerced by this dude into buying this pair of jeans that looks cool in the mall mirrors but looks so 1870 when you look at it from the bedroom mirror and compare it to the other pairs in the closet...
I get the same feeling about having Pratibha Patil or Bhairon Singh Shekhawat as India's next President.
Now for something i am passionate about. Books. I am into non-fiction (Mindfarters can be into serious stuff). Strangely, all the four books i am into, at the moment have a strong fixation to India. Its history and people. Goa : A Daughter's Story, Maximum City, The Last Mughal and India in Slow Motion. And the next two books on the agenda are Ramachandra Guha's India After Gandhi and Dominique Lapierre's Freedom At Midnight
Given the unpredictable nature of the world in general and my mind in particular, that reading list is subject to change.
Posted by Jason at 8:11 PM
Thursday, July 05, 2007
Tennis has eye candy for the guys...
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Nearly 100 activists of the right-wing extremist outfit Battlestar Galacticoz today barged in to the local Pao-Bhaji restaurant near the Municipal Market in the town center and smashed window panes and overturned tables, creating a huge ruckus in the entire process.
Most of the activists, clad in cheap imitation Galacticoz armor, and shouting slogans that sounded like 'Jai Batata Bhaji' and 'Jai Misal Pao', were young and full of enthusiasm in what they believed was the most important campaign in India since the 1857 Mutiny. The General Secretary of the organisation explained that the quality of food dished out at such outlets degraded national culture. Elaborating further, he said the general method of preparation and presentation was very Westernised and hence they decided to teach the owners and staff a lesson. The activists on their part believed that they were making a strong statement to all restaurant owners who did not adhere to indigenous processes and materials. Their believed their campaign will find support among the masses.
A few Galacticoz barged into the kitchen of the restaurant and bashed the cooks and cleaners, accusing them of using less sugar in the tea and using more Westernised ingredients in a majority of the other items on the menu. The activists demanded that the menu cards be altered and the word 'potato' be replaced by 'batata'. The restaurant owners however, refused to budge. They cited the rising cost for reprinting menus and suggested that the activists whack all the waiters and leave before any further damage to property ensued. Better sense prevailed after the Galacticoz were informed that the waiters were exponents of martial art and armed with forks and butter knives.
Champak Rammaiya (name changed to protect life), who owns a shoe shop in the same town center and was a witness to all the frenzied activity, said he hid all the pairs of Western shoes in his shop fearing he may be the next person under attack. In the chaos that followed, neighbouring shopkeepers downed their shutters till armed security personnel were posted in the area.
Reminiscent of the manner in which threats are issued by fundamentalist extremist Muslim terror groups to America and its allies, the Battlestar Galacticoz issued warnings to the World Bhelpuri Sellers Confederation to alter their menus to suit oriental tastes without incorporating any Western ingredients in their cooking, or else face the consequences. The Galacticoz have also issued similliar warnings to all ice-gola cart owners.
The rampaging mob left after a good 30 minutes of hooliganism, carrying with them sacks of potatoes, onions and other vegetables and fruits.
Posted by Jason at 7:23 PM